Pump Up the Volume

Greetings from a certain mystery lady!

Today I would like to call your attention to my insane downstairs neighbor. She is a total LUNATIC to the Nth degree. On Saturday morning, I got out of bed and she started RAP RAP RAPPING on my floor (her ceiling) with a broom. DUDES! Am I supposed to stay in bed all day? It was 11am!!! WTF? So, I totally stayed in bed for a little while, but then it was like, "No! This is my apt! I need to go to the bathroom!" When I stepped on the floor, she started banging again. RAP RAP RAP RAP! I walked barefoot to the bathroom and returned to my room and more banging. A few moments later, this insane lady is banging at my door, telling me she's trying to sleep and I do this every Saturday. What? I've only lived here two weeks lady and last weekend I was hanging with the Brainfart dudes! She tells me to keep it down, she works at nights, THERE'S A BABY DOWNSTAIRS, etc. CAN'T I HEAR HER BANGING?!?

Yeah, I can hear you. QUIT MAKING SUCH A RACKET, LADY!

Meanwhile I'm not opening the door, which really pisses her off. "OPEN THE F-ING DOOR!" She screams.

Uh, no. I don't open the door to cursing angry PSYCHOS. Unfortunately I live above one.

xox Mystery Lady