Many of you may remember how I ate an uncooked sausage the other day. and only the supreme and unknown powers of the universe were able to save me from becoming INFESTED with with with with parasitical trick ah nosis. One other risky mistake i made recently was to eat fish that was very much on the edge of being expired. In this case my stomach of steel held off any adverse effects. NEVERTHELESS I did feel a little weird afterwards, like something was "A LITTLE BIT FISHY?" I don't know if you understand that joke, but let me assure you that its very VERY funny. And it never does anyone any harm to laugh. In fact if you laugh it might be the same as doing sit-ups and hey- whats more fun? Am I right? Yes. or no? yes.
ok
So the final RANDOMLY SKETCHY situation occurred when i got a new filter (YES THE SAME FILTER I MENTIONED A FEW DAYS AGO) so i put this filter in the pitcher and yes started drinking the water. then I noticed a TERRIBLE BLACK CLOUD OF CARBON FLOATING ON THE BOTTOM OF THE PITCHER. -(after i drank several glasses of the water). What the hell is going on with all of this tainted stuff?question!
r dynmaic
Dear Rocky,
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you could use some good advice about food. It just so happens that I have recently received some good advice about food from food experts.
First, the deli guy who made my udon soup today told me that Seaweed cleans your blood. I told him I didn't like seaweed and he said I should eat it anyway and gave me two extra large scoops of it. And you know what, it's not so bad. My blood already feels cleaner. aaahhhh!
Secondly, inside my reeses peanut butter cup wrapper it reads clearly in print, officially, "CANDY IS A TREAT. CONSUME IN MODERATION." Perfectly said.
And lastly, from my friend Bob, parasites are nothing to be scared of. Many people in New York would kill to get a parasitic friend, especially models or people that want to lose weight. If you got one, you could probably sell it on Craig's list and make some extra cash.$$
Hope this helps!
signed,
a concerned fan
Dear Rocky, I have a food question for you, A LA if-a-tree-falls type of inquiry. If I am a NO MEAT type of girl, and I suspect that there might be an eensy-weensy bit of fishy oils in my food, but I don't CONFIRM the presence of these fish oils (fish==meat by my rules!), am I still not eating meat?
ReplyDeleteSincerely,
cermak
My heart feels warm as if I had clean blood when I get lovely comments about real concerns. Re: fishoils- as far as i am concerned you may probably be eating meat everyday? I hate to break it to you, I used to work in a restaurant and we used to put meat in vegi food all the time just for joking. Just kidding! but really if you have a vegetarian in your heart I think that's what counts.
ReplyDeleteCandy IS a treat and so are sunsets but what should be taken in moderation? Its your choice
rky
My heart feels warm as if I had clean blood when I get lovely comments about real concerns. Re: fishoils- as far as i am concerned you may probably be eating meat everyday? I hate to break it to you, I used to work in a restaurant and we used to put meat in vegi food all the time just for joking. Just kidding! but really if you have a vegetarian in your heart I think that's what counts.
ReplyDeleteCandy IS a treat and so are sunsets but what should be taken in moderation? Its your choice
rky
one more comment about food. I went to eat some green beans that were in my fridge in a plastic bag... and the bag was all shredded. like a rodent had scratched it up. But how could a rodent READ MOUSE. get into the fridge and then get away and not leave a trace of evidence? Might be a good question for PI pribaate inventeigorors
ReplyDeleter
Maybe your roommate did it.
ReplyDeletenice. maybe time for a serious confrontation. or maybe i'll just leave a note under his pillow that says "I KNOW YOU RIPPED THE GREENBEAN BAG. WATCH YOUR BACK"r
ReplyDeletePerhaps you were slipped some AMBIEN (i.e., sleeping pills that cause you to eat everything in your fridge in the middle of the night == american == patriotic!). And maybe you didn't have enough chocolate cake in you kitchen and decided to rip into the greens instead?
ReplyDelete