You know what scares the living daylights out of me? WHEN I TRY TO THINK BACK ABOUT WHAT THE HELL I DID LAST WEEK AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID. I think I had this problem my whole life Bcuz I remember when I was a kid I made a little calender and I made dot for each thing I did in a day. I though it was a secret code and then I remember asking my little sis: HEY LITTLE SIS: DO YOU KNOW WHAT ALL THESE LITTLE DOTS MEAN? AND she was like yea and she knew - so then I think I stopped doing that, Bcuz it wasn't as cool as i thought it was.
I JUST DON'T WANT THE LIFE TO SLIP THROUGH MY FINGERS. But if you think about it, you are constatnly forgetting things, infact, I would say the default is forgotten. See this kindOf stuff happens when you compare notes with some that just went on vacation -----)-)-))) (SIDEWAYS PALM TREE).
Do you know what U did last mondy?????>>??>U&*&*$(%)$78*&YOR*RTYUORYUIO$%&Y*Y*&$
ROckY
VERSION 17. bloGging since B4 adding pictures to blog posts was coOL!
Monday, August 30, 2004
Friday, August 27, 2004
RNC YOU GOT A HOLD ON ME
we can all smell it here in manhattan. the RNC is coming! RUN! HIDE! STOCK UP ON FOOD!
so, how are YOU preparing for the RNC? I myself am working hard both at home and in the workplace. you see, I can CONTROL the CELLULAR SERVICE in madison square garden from my desk. at the CLICK OF MY TRACKWHEEL MOUSE, POOF! bye bye to any republican who uses a cell phone on MY NETWORK! MWAHAHAHA!
I also am ordering like a THREE WEEK SUPPLY of groceries from freshdirect just in case the MILLIONS OF PROTESTERS break out of the CHELSEA PIERS PRISON and never leave our FREAKING CITY. you're laughing now, but in a week when this city goes APESHIT and all the tourists have EATEN OUR FOOD, see who's chomping on some tender FREE-RANGE CHICKEN and ORGANIC OKRA.
TO SUM UP, every night I look at the apartment across the way from my building and see a BIG SIGN that says 'BUSH' in xmas lights. it reminds me that CHAOS may be on its way, but DAMMIT I'M READY.
so, how are YOU preparing for the RNC? I myself am working hard both at home and in the workplace. you see, I can CONTROL the CELLULAR SERVICE in madison square garden from my desk. at the CLICK OF MY TRACKWHEEL MOUSE, POOF! bye bye to any republican who uses a cell phone on MY NETWORK! MWAHAHAHA!
I also am ordering like a THREE WEEK SUPPLY of groceries from freshdirect just in case the MILLIONS OF PROTESTERS break out of the CHELSEA PIERS PRISON and never leave our FREAKING CITY. you're laughing now, but in a week when this city goes APESHIT and all the tourists have EATEN OUR FOOD, see who's chomping on some tender FREE-RANGE CHICKEN and ORGANIC OKRA.
TO SUM UP, every night I look at the apartment across the way from my building and see a BIG SIGN that says 'BUSH' in xmas lights. it reminds me that CHAOS may be on its way, but DAMMIT I'M READY.
some tips on how to RUN A NATION
hey whats up?? SERVUS!! as we say in TRANSYLVANIA.
THis is kojak checking in like Uncle Travelling Max on the FRAGGLES (remember that???)
One thing I have to say is that some nations really have NOT caught on to the whole idea that TOURISTS ARE A GREAT WAY TO MAKE YOUR PEOPLE SOME MONEY!!!! THis seems so obvious but the rulers of the UKRAINE (possibly a chairman or commandante of some sort) appartently don't know whats up.
One obvious problem is that THEY TRY AS HARD AS POSSIBLE TO KEEP YOU OUT. WHy should I need a VISA for a place noone even likes?? and after that why are there SKETCHY ARMY DUDES manning the border post and giving everyoone a hard time??? They made me walk back and forth between all these KIOSKS so they could yell at me and write illegible stuff on little scaps of paper. (If I had lost these scraps of paper I would probably be in PRISON right now).
Also once inside the country its nice to have some stores for people to go to (LIKE DUTY FREE SHOPS, etc). UKRAINE only had people standing next to the road holding up random stuff they found outside like VEGETABLES MUSHROOMS AND FISH. If you tried to talk these people I'm sure they were nice but really I think THEY COULD USE SOME BUILDINGS, SIGNS, ETC.
SO needless to say I didn't stay long.
~~~~```KOJAK
THis is kojak checking in like Uncle Travelling Max on the FRAGGLES (remember that???)
One thing I have to say is that some nations really have NOT caught on to the whole idea that TOURISTS ARE A GREAT WAY TO MAKE YOUR PEOPLE SOME MONEY!!!! THis seems so obvious but the rulers of the UKRAINE (possibly a chairman or commandante of some sort) appartently don't know whats up.
One obvious problem is that THEY TRY AS HARD AS POSSIBLE TO KEEP YOU OUT. WHy should I need a VISA for a place noone even likes?? and after that why are there SKETCHY ARMY DUDES manning the border post and giving everyoone a hard time??? They made me walk back and forth between all these KIOSKS so they could yell at me and write illegible stuff on little scaps of paper. (If I had lost these scraps of paper I would probably be in PRISON right now).
Also once inside the country its nice to have some stores for people to go to (LIKE DUTY FREE SHOPS, etc). UKRAINE only had people standing next to the road holding up random stuff they found outside like VEGETABLES MUSHROOMS AND FISH. If you tried to talk these people I'm sure they were nice but really I think THEY COULD USE SOME BUILDINGS, SIGNS, ETC.
SO needless to say I didn't stay long.
~~~~```KOJAK
Wednesday, August 25, 2004
Seasonable fashion: OLYMPICA SENSIBILITY
I will be the first to call this one: JUST LIKE I DID WITH SUMMER _ I AM TELLING YOU RIGHT NOW, get ready for the fall. What does fall mean? it means fall fashion and it means nothing else.
Whats hot this season? GOOD QUESTION: well its not the weather, the weather is going to get COLD. Its TUBE SOCKS. and its track spikes, just like always. The track spikes are the MOST FASHIONABLE THING POSSIBLE (great for weddings).
THIS is what I call "OLYMPIC FASHION" and it is really exciting. All the latest styles exhibited in volleyball, ROWING, and other sports. I suggest tacking on a little paper number on your back if you can't think of anything else. That is always a "winner" ----get it??
Here is another one - really Awesome OAKLEY WRAPAROUND SUNGLASSES. Basically the faster you look, the coooler you are.
NOw for hair. My vote for best hair in the Olympics goes to some japanese gymanst guy - it didn't look like he combed it ever in his life - total GYMNASTIPUNK. a 9.876 out of a starting value of 10.
What else? My vote for most naturally "indie" looking chick- TOM on the US volleyball team. And who can forget when that dude that wore a baseball cap in the 100meter dash? this is sure to set on a wave of hats like fire across the nations faster youth.
rocKY
Whats hot this season? GOOD QUESTION: well its not the weather, the weather is going to get COLD. Its TUBE SOCKS. and its track spikes, just like always. The track spikes are the MOST FASHIONABLE THING POSSIBLE (great for weddings).
THIS is what I call "OLYMPIC FASHION" and it is really exciting. All the latest styles exhibited in volleyball, ROWING, and other sports. I suggest tacking on a little paper number on your back if you can't think of anything else. That is always a "winner" ----get it??
Here is another one - really Awesome OAKLEY WRAPAROUND SUNGLASSES. Basically the faster you look, the coooler you are.
NOw for hair. My vote for best hair in the Olympics goes to some japanese gymanst guy - it didn't look like he combed it ever in his life - total GYMNASTIPUNK. a 9.876 out of a starting value of 10.
What else? My vote for most naturally "indie" looking chick- TOM on the US volleyball team. And who can forget when that dude that wore a baseball cap in the 100meter dash? this is sure to set on a wave of hats like fire across the nations faster youth.
rocKY
Tuesday, August 24, 2004
ARE WE HABING A LUNCH OR WHA?
NEW JOB MEANS NEW FREINDS RIGHT? Wrong. People are liars and birches. "Hey, Welcome to the JOB LET"s GO OUT TO LUNCH," The seemingly nice/cool lady says to me. And then what? NOTHING! SHE BARELY EVEN SAYS HELLO IN THE LADIES ROOM NOW.
Well, little does that lady know I made another friend at work. Another new girl. A nice friend who has helped me to found the SANDWICH CLUB. What is the SANDWICH CLUB, you may be asking yourself? WEll, the sandwich club is division of labor, the sandwich club is the key financial freedom, the sandwich club is highly socialized and exceedingly refined. Let me break it down:
TWO DAYS A WEEK + TWO NEW GIRLS + FOUR SANDWICHES = non stop fun! maximum thrift! delicious midday meals!
Today I made sandwiches for both of us. Wednesday, she will make them for us. Tuesday, Thursday and Friday I will make my own mutha f'in sandwiches cause I'm thrifty like that. YES. HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT LADY IN THE BATHROOM WITH THE EMPTY PROMISES OF LUNCH. Yeah, I thought so...you keeping buying your $10 midtown lunches, I'm saving my bread for the new girls of the SANDWICH CLUB.
Well, little does that lady know I made another friend at work. Another new girl. A nice friend who has helped me to found the SANDWICH CLUB. What is the SANDWICH CLUB, you may be asking yourself? WEll, the sandwich club is division of labor, the sandwich club is the key financial freedom, the sandwich club is highly socialized and exceedingly refined. Let me break it down:
TWO DAYS A WEEK + TWO NEW GIRLS + FOUR SANDWICHES = non stop fun! maximum thrift! delicious midday meals!
Today I made sandwiches for both of us. Wednesday, she will make them for us. Tuesday, Thursday and Friday I will make my own mutha f'in sandwiches cause I'm thrifty like that. YES. HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT LADY IN THE BATHROOM WITH THE EMPTY PROMISES OF LUNCH. Yeah, I thought so...you keeping buying your $10 midtown lunches, I'm saving my bread for the new girls of the SANDWICH CLUB.
Saturday, August 21, 2004
check it out _ I'm in HUNGARY
hey everyone I'm blogging it up in Hungary.
I don't have much time cuz this is costing me $$$ (actually not - there's some strange money called Lita or something like that.)
Actually its not so differenent from AMERICA except iI'm suurounded right now by some beautiful ARCHITECTURES and I have seen a buch of TINY COMMUNIST STYLE CARS like the one BONO had in that one U2 video. aCTUALLY a lot of stuff could be in a U@ video.
I would try to say something in HUngarian right now but its really hard - but HELLO MEANS GOODBYE I THINK
so HElllllooooo!!!
kOJAK
I don't have much time cuz this is costing me $$$ (actually not - there's some strange money called Lita or something like that.)
Actually its not so differenent from AMERICA except iI'm suurounded right now by some beautiful ARCHITECTURES and I have seen a buch of TINY COMMUNIST STYLE CARS like the one BONO had in that one U2 video. aCTUALLY a lot of stuff could be in a U@ video.
I would try to say something in HUngarian right now but its really hard - but HELLO MEANS GOODBYE I THINK
so HElllllooooo!!!
kOJAK
Thursday, August 19, 2004
Ultimate state of CONFUSION
To those who are astute readers of this blog you may have noticed that over the last 2 dayz I have made 3 DIFFERENT POSTINGS all of which I have erased from the blog within a span of 12 hours. I think what I am trying to get at here is this is a MONUMNETOUS EVENT FOR RSBFART because it is the 40th posting performed. This at a time when our country is at a MONUMENTOUS TURNING POINT. I am just a bit superstitious so I don't want to FU^*K this posting up. My fingers tremble as I reach for the CAPS BUTTON which I know all too well, I know that the signigicance of this blog reaches far and wide and will have repurcussiuouns on political fronts AS WELL AS SOCIAL ONES. MUCH LIKE A BUTTERFLY FLAPPING ITS WINGS IN THE "asian tiger" economic market and next thing you know BOOM we lose 50 thousand donuts from a local dunkin donuts.
For those postings taht prevously occupied this premeir 40th postition (1. aTMOSHPERE, a kind of social anxiety discourse 2. I forgot the 2nd one and 3. "you LEarn OSMSTHING new everyday", about what my clients like to eat)
Those are gone with the winds of time, save that last one, which will be published should there be SUFFICIENT POPULAR DEMAND.
My message today is watch out! :() everything you do HAS SEVERE SEVERE EFFECTTS ONN THE UNIVERSE
ROcKy
For those postings taht prevously occupied this premeir 40th postition (1. aTMOSHPERE, a kind of social anxiety discourse 2. I forgot the 2nd one and 3. "you LEarn OSMSTHING new everyday", about what my clients like to eat)
Those are gone with the winds of time, save that last one, which will be published should there be SUFFICIENT POPULAR DEMAND.
My message today is watch out! :() everything you do HAS SEVERE SEVERE EFFECTTS ONN THE UNIVERSE
ROcKy
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
HAMMing it up
I was watching MEN'S GYMNASTICS on tv the other day, BECAUSE I WAS FORCED TO. I don't mind women's gymnastics, but frankly male GYMNASTS are gymNASTY. I noticed that a couple guys on the ROMANIAN TEAM had particularly SINEWY MUSCLES that were GROSSING ME OUT. then there was the odd-looking CHINESE TEAM whose lower bodies resembled flimsy chopsticks as they showed the rest of the world how the PUMMELHORSE is DONE. SHIIIIIT. but the "CREEPIEST OF ALL" male contestant were the US team's twin terrors, the HAMM BROTHERS. TOTALLY FREAKIN' FREAKY. I couldn't watch for more than 10 seconds at a time without having to TURN MY HEAD AWAY from the telescreen. it was too TWILIGHT ZONE-ish for this one. to see TWO IDENTICAL DUDES GO THROUGH THE EXACT SAME FLOOR/POMMELHORSE/STILL RINGS ROUTINES, with but minor variations in skill! I mean, do identical twins really need to further accentuate the fact that they are IDENTICAL?
*buries head in hands*
-intoccabile
*buries head in hands*
-intoccabile
Friday, August 13, 2004
THE TRICK
WOAh wtf?? OMG it has been SO LONG since I blogged. I think what was holding me back is the shear degree of high quality articles coming from rsbfart these days. Its a little bit intimidating to tell you the truth, But then I just have to say to myself Rocky, rocky I say BLOGGING is just about letting yourself go, just letting your innards flow onto the page or the screen. I would like to think of a really good topic that we can all relate to, but SOMETIMES I JUST CAN'T.
I could tell you about the new GROCERY STORE IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD. Or the IGUANA I SAW UP IN A TREE THAT JUMPED DOWN AND LANDED ON SOMEONE'S HEAD AND BIT THEIR TONGUE OUT. Just kidding - thats magical realism (as in the literary GENRE). But seroiously folks, My brother will testify that he saw a huge SPIDER COME OUT A TREE AND LAND ON SOMEONE's head once in MEXICO. and that was REALITY not even reality TV.
About reality TV. I got new idea for a TV series. TEll me what you all think. First of all you have to pick an existing reality show: FOR EXAMPLE SURVIVOR. then closely study the relationships and so forh that were built during a season. Then you write a script that DRAMATIZES IT and then you film like a made for TV movie about "what really went on when the camera wasn't rolling, or even when it was rolling:. OK NOW HERE''S THE TRICK. SO WHAT YOU DO NEXT IS GET A SMALL VIDEO CREW TO DO A REALITY STYLE FILMING OF THE MAKING OF THE DRAMATIZATION OF THE REALITY SHOW THAT WAS SO FAR FLUNG THAT IT WASN'T EVEN REALITY IN THE FIRST PLACE. HOly Sh(**TT that idea is so good I can't beleive I am making it public. Anyone want to make that film with me?
ROCkY
I could tell you about the new GROCERY STORE IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD. Or the IGUANA I SAW UP IN A TREE THAT JUMPED DOWN AND LANDED ON SOMEONE'S HEAD AND BIT THEIR TONGUE OUT. Just kidding - thats magical realism (as in the literary GENRE). But seroiously folks, My brother will testify that he saw a huge SPIDER COME OUT A TREE AND LAND ON SOMEONE's head once in MEXICO. and that was REALITY not even reality TV.
About reality TV. I got new idea for a TV series. TEll me what you all think. First of all you have to pick an existing reality show: FOR EXAMPLE SURVIVOR. then closely study the relationships and so forh that were built during a season. Then you write a script that DRAMATIZES IT and then you film like a made for TV movie about "what really went on when the camera wasn't rolling, or even when it was rolling:. OK NOW HERE''S THE TRICK. SO WHAT YOU DO NEXT IS GET A SMALL VIDEO CREW TO DO A REALITY STYLE FILMING OF THE MAKING OF THE DRAMATIZATION OF THE REALITY SHOW THAT WAS SO FAR FLUNG THAT IT WASN'T EVEN REALITY IN THE FIRST PLACE. HOly Sh(**TT that idea is so good I can't beleive I am making it public. Anyone want to make that film with me?
ROCkY
Wednesday, August 11, 2004
SHHHH
Logan is back from a trip to the friendliest state in the world, the SHOW ME STATE. How friendly is the SHOW ME STATE? well, EVERYONE smiles and WAVES to each other through the shields of their automobiles, even if you are not pretty or are a STRANGER. Around town people often know who you are just because they know your PARENTS and they make SMALL CHATS, that is, asking questions but not really GETTING IT. The good people of SHOW ME LAND are also quite CERTAIN, perfectly REASSURED, that GAY PEOPLE SHALL NOT MARRY. It's not what GOD would have wanted for our nation. Even though there's already a law against it in the state, just to be ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN the good people voted to make an extra precaution which we call an AMENDMENT. Perhaps there are simply many OLD PEOPLE in SHOW ME LAND? Perhaps. Is it CHRISTIAN to refuse GAY PEOPLE official UNION? What if the GAY PEOPLE are NO DIFFERENT than the little CHILDREN, dirty grubby whiny unimportanat CHILDREN, that Jesus SUFFERED to come unto him? But you have probably heard of all this. Incidentally I believe I purchased a certain BRIDAL GARMENT in SHOW ME LAND, it's true. It is white and not so different from an expensive bathrobe. Does this make me a HYPOCRITE? how do I SHOW THEM that civic laws are not RELIGIOUS COMMMANDS?
Query to ROCKY, what kind of shoes does an URBAN friendly /indelibly SHOW ME bride-to-be require? A dilemma, if there ever was one. I mean: WHITE FOOTWEAR -- how will they ever be cool enough?
There are many new STRIVERS back in my uppest west side HOOD and such people wear the darndest things to, OF ALL PLACES, the LIBRARY. I sat behind a young lady (not mystery lady, who really should walk the blocks between 103-6 more), a young reader, who in her chair, from the back, jacket slung over the chairback, appeared, wholly and completely, BLOOMING NAKED. was it one of those BABY DOLL COTTONS that everyone seems to put above their jeans? Was it a TUBE TOP? was it too HOT in the library? (no: books hate heat). if i were a male, any type, i would have a difficult time studying instead of wondering about love in the afternoon.
Last overly political question: or maybe it's a POLL: in 30 - 40 years, will we DEMAND that our PRESIDENT have SERVED IN THE IRAQ WAR and if he HAS, will we, we who now sit in offices and god knows where libraries, will we be able to accuse him of unfortunately being in NAJAF when in order to really be BRAVE, he should have been in BAGHDAD ? or maybe he drove an SUV or Convoy Truck as opposed to a HELICOPTER? and if so , does anyone know WHO THAT WILL BE?
it's a halter folks, a halter top, obscured by hair. overreaction.
--logan
Query to ROCKY, what kind of shoes does an URBAN friendly /indelibly SHOW ME bride-to-be require? A dilemma, if there ever was one. I mean: WHITE FOOTWEAR -- how will they ever be cool enough?
There are many new STRIVERS back in my uppest west side HOOD and such people wear the darndest things to, OF ALL PLACES, the LIBRARY. I sat behind a young lady (not mystery lady, who really should walk the blocks between 103-6 more), a young reader, who in her chair, from the back, jacket slung over the chairback, appeared, wholly and completely, BLOOMING NAKED. was it one of those BABY DOLL COTTONS that everyone seems to put above their jeans? Was it a TUBE TOP? was it too HOT in the library? (no: books hate heat). if i were a male, any type, i would have a difficult time studying instead of wondering about love in the afternoon.
Last overly political question: or maybe it's a POLL: in 30 - 40 years, will we DEMAND that our PRESIDENT have SERVED IN THE IRAQ WAR and if he HAS, will we, we who now sit in offices and god knows where libraries, will we be able to accuse him of unfortunately being in NAJAF when in order to really be BRAVE, he should have been in BAGHDAD ? or maybe he drove an SUV or Convoy Truck as opposed to a HELICOPTER? and if so , does anyone know WHO THAT WILL BE?
it's a halter folks, a halter top, obscured by hair. overreaction.
--logan
TROUBLED BY INSECTS
Here's a poetic thought for the day: ever think of how insects can SYBOLIZE BOTH THE BEST AND WORST OF SUMMERTIME.
For example we have, the pleasant chirping of CRICKETS but also the irritaging buzz of the FLY.
Another thing I've noticed is the more TROPICAL it gets the more totally out of control the insects become.
A scientist might want to test this hypothesis over the whole world but I myself can tell you one thing: its way hotter than normal in Seattle this year (global warming? hello!!) and the BUGS have seen fit to start acting Iike the OWN THE PLACE!!
I was trying to have a nice hike in the FOREST yesterday and all of sudden I hear BUZZZZING all around me. Well, I was thinking of all the advise you get from people telling you to REMAIN CALM AND GO ABOUT NORMAL in this kind of insect situation. But guess what?? that advise waswrong because these WASPS or whatever the hell they were just started atteacking my legs. Once I decided calmeness wasn't gwtting me anywhere I booked it doen the trail but not before those BEASTS had STUNG me like two times on each leg.
Fastfoward to today and I'm tring to relax in the park after work but the YELLOW JACKETS are BUGGIN me like they have been all day. Again I think about all those smart alecs who say that swatting bees only makes them ANGRY. This time I'm not willing to sit back and let some bugs CRAWL ALL OVER ME for a while then STING me just for the hell of it. So, y'a know what, I took my sandel and smacked one good and it FELL TO THE GROUND. SO WHO"S ANGRY NOW???? not the yellow jacket because I hit it again and it was DEAD.
Now I am a real ANIMAL LOVER. If I see you eat veal I will look down on you forever. But the YEllow JACKET isn't even a real bee. It's not honorable: when I killed the one its friends just flew away and doesn't make HONEY I don't think. So Your best to show it what's up....
^^^^^kOjAk
For example we have, the pleasant chirping of CRICKETS but also the irritaging buzz of the FLY.
Another thing I've noticed is the more TROPICAL it gets the more totally out of control the insects become.
A scientist might want to test this hypothesis over the whole world but I myself can tell you one thing: its way hotter than normal in Seattle this year (global warming? hello!!) and the BUGS have seen fit to start acting Iike the OWN THE PLACE!!
I was trying to have a nice hike in the FOREST yesterday and all of sudden I hear BUZZZZING all around me. Well, I was thinking of all the advise you get from people telling you to REMAIN CALM AND GO ABOUT NORMAL in this kind of insect situation. But guess what?? that advise waswrong because these WASPS or whatever the hell they were just started atteacking my legs. Once I decided calmeness wasn't gwtting me anywhere I booked it doen the trail but not before those BEASTS had STUNG me like two times on each leg.
Fastfoward to today and I'm tring to relax in the park after work but the YELLOW JACKETS are BUGGIN me like they have been all day. Again I think about all those smart alecs who say that swatting bees only makes them ANGRY. This time I'm not willing to sit back and let some bugs CRAWL ALL OVER ME for a while then STING me just for the hell of it. So, y'a know what, I took my sandel and smacked one good and it FELL TO THE GROUND. SO WHO"S ANGRY NOW???? not the yellow jacket because I hit it again and it was DEAD.
Now I am a real ANIMAL LOVER. If I see you eat veal I will look down on you forever. But the YEllow JACKET isn't even a real bee. It's not honorable: when I killed the one its friends just flew away and doesn't make HONEY I don't think. So Your best to show it what's up....
^^^^^kOjAk
Monday, August 09, 2004
ROCKY's Cat = rubix cubix COOLEST CAT EVER
My cat is named RUBIX CUBIX and no other cat can ever step to her. She can PLAY FETCH LIKE A REAL DOG. She seriously gets stuff that you throw and brings it back to you again so you can throw it again. Also the other day there were about 10 to 12 people at my house screaming and playing PINGPONG, and Rubix JUST WAS SLEEPING THERE ON A CHAIR PAYING NO HEED TO EVERYONE. In fact at one point she even jumped on the table and tried to attack the ball, and then she fell asleep on the table. She is SO BOLD **(&*($&#@*)^$*
She came from BIde-a-wee pound and is just another example of how ADOPTING AN ANIMAL HELPS YOU AND HELPS THE UNIVERSE. She destroyed a rat problem, and she sometimes DRINKS WATER WITH HER PAW, and she also walks around like a monkey, additionally she will lick your hand if you pet her. I have had this cat for a while, actually I co-own rubix with a good lady-friend of mine.
What else? A few times I thought she was lost :( but she was just hiding ;) HA HA HA HA HAHAHHAHA AHAH HA AHA AH AHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ROCKY
She came from BIde-a-wee pound and is just another example of how ADOPTING AN ANIMAL HELPS YOU AND HELPS THE UNIVERSE. She destroyed a rat problem, and she sometimes DRINKS WATER WITH HER PAW, and she also walks around like a monkey, additionally she will lick your hand if you pet her. I have had this cat for a while, actually I co-own rubix with a good lady-friend of mine.
What else? A few times I thought she was lost :( but she was just hiding ;) HA HA HA HA HAHAHHAHA AHAH HA AHA AH AHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ROCKY
STUDIES OF ASTROLOGy
A BIG SHOUT to rocky, kojak, logan, mystery lady, and anyone else on this weblog of TRUTH and PINK GOODNESS. my name is INTOCCABILE, which means something in SOME FOREIGN LANGUAGE.
my question today is, WHAT PERCENTAGE of these FRIENDSTER/MYSPACE/HIPSTIR SITES is for NETWORKING, and what percentage is for MACKING? I recently joined myspace following the lead of my CLOSE and PERSONAL friend rivers. IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWING my registration, BAM! in come 10 PRIVATE MESSAGES from some very UNINTERESTING HORNY GUYS. I don't recall posting anything about being SINGLE, NEKKID, or HORNY, so I was taken ABACK BY the SHEER AMOUNT OF JUNKMAIL in the first MINUTES of my existence in myspace. here's a taste:
"hi im aries im a gentlemen honest and would love to get to know you better before i leave nyc i go to Norwich university where i am a cadet majoring in three major Studies of peace Studies Of War and Studies of Diplomacy
Love Aries
p.s. im very attracted to you
im me please"
HONESTLY that was a TOUGH ONE to let slip through my fingers, but you know what they say: IF YOU TRULY LOVE THEM, LET THEM GO.
my question today is, WHAT PERCENTAGE of these FRIENDSTER/MYSPACE/HIPSTIR SITES is for NETWORKING, and what percentage is for MACKING? I recently joined myspace following the lead of my CLOSE and PERSONAL friend rivers. IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWING my registration, BAM! in come 10 PRIVATE MESSAGES from some very UNINTERESTING HORNY GUYS. I don't recall posting anything about being SINGLE, NEKKID, or HORNY, so I was taken ABACK BY the SHEER AMOUNT OF JUNKMAIL in the first MINUTES of my existence in myspace. here's a taste:
"hi im aries im a gentlemen honest and would love to get to know you better before i leave nyc i go to Norwich university where i am a cadet majoring in three major Studies of peace Studies Of War and Studies of Diplomacy
Love Aries
p.s. im very attracted to you
im me please"
HONESTLY that was a TOUGH ONE to let slip through my fingers, but you know what they say: IF YOU TRULY LOVE THEM, LET THEM GO.
Saturday, August 07, 2004
an extraordinary adventure which befell kojak at a summer cottage
hey everyone, its SO NICE to see so many old and FACES [ :) :( :-0 ha ha!] populating this blog. Yes that includes you MYSTERY LADY and also R PUB who seems to be belligerent as ever. BTW I will proofread this message but not too much so as to diminish from the BRAINFART aspect.
Anyways, as regards the title it is more of a PROJECTION INTO THE FUTURE than the usual summary of daily events.
i. e. I am going to ROMANIA soon and I'm totally PSYCHED about it. I've been sufing up a storm on the web so why don't you check out some great stuff I found:
http://www.sighetumarmatiei.alphanet.ro/sighet_cazari/complex_mara_eng.html
This one looks like a really AWESOME PLACE TO KICK-BACK-RELAX. Check out the bar it looks amazing and i bet you can get TOTALLY WASTED FOR LIKE 25 CENTS. I'll drink to all you New Yorkers getting ripped off!!!!
Or maybe if I want to get extra close to nature at stay at this one "IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NATURE" !!!:
http://www.sighetumarmatiei.alphanet.ro/sighet_cazari/poeni_eng.html
Also the owner looks UBER_RESPECTABLE - an important thing when travelling in the more SKETCHY PARTS OF THE WORLD.
In any case, I plan on finding a CYBER CAFE and blogging to everyone back home to keep you updated. But don't worry I'm not going for a couple of weeks yet.
∆∆∆∆∆∆ Kojak øøøøø
Anyways, as regards the title it is more of a PROJECTION INTO THE FUTURE than the usual summary of daily events.
i. e. I am going to ROMANIA soon and I'm totally PSYCHED about it. I've been sufing up a storm on the web so why don't you check out some great stuff I found:
http://www.sighetumarmatiei.alphanet.ro/sighet_cazari/complex_mara_eng.html
This one looks like a really AWESOME PLACE TO KICK-BACK-RELAX. Check out the bar it looks amazing and i bet you can get TOTALLY WASTED FOR LIKE 25 CENTS. I'll drink to all you New Yorkers getting ripped off!!!!
Or maybe if I want to get extra close to nature at stay at this one "IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NATURE" !!!:
http://www.sighetumarmatiei.alphanet.ro/sighet_cazari/poeni_eng.html
Also the owner looks UBER_RESPECTABLE - an important thing when travelling in the more SKETCHY PARTS OF THE WORLD.
In any case, I plan on finding a CYBER CAFE and blogging to everyone back home to keep you updated. But don't worry I'm not going for a couple of weeks yet.
∆∆∆∆∆∆ Kojak øøøøø
Friday, August 06, 2004
No, I wouldn't like to help John Kerry today JACKASS!
Hey, you know what bugs the CRAP out of me? Those douche-bag young DEMS toting clipboards and LOITERING on the STREETS to ask me if I want to help out John KERRY. How am I suppose to respond to these NINCOMPOOPS when I'm in a rush to get to DWANE REED to buy $70 worth of CANDY? Do I say, "Get a job.", "Bush rules!", or simply "No. No I don't." Jeezum. This is getting me WORKED UP! Don't these kids know that most people don't fall for these bullshit GREENPEACE begging tactics? If young motivated people want to get political, it's fine by me, but WTF? Shouldn't they be a little more CREATIVE about it. I mean, make clever signs on CARDBOARD like bums do. Everybody LOVES bums. They make us feel better about who WE are, because WE are not as pathetic as THEM. But no, these young Kerry BOOGERS take the moral highground just to make the rest of us feel like LESSER BEINGS--like somehow, because we don't CARE about POLITICAL CHANGE as much as they do, that we are less useful to the growth of our NATION. I've just got one message for these FINGER POINTERS. Stop POINTING your DAMN FINGERS and go out and find Osama Bin Laden! Then maybe I'll sign your STUPID petition.
R-Pub
p.s. When are you going to get a spellchecker on this damn blog? For REAL.
R-Pub
p.s. When are you going to get a spellchecker on this damn blog? For REAL.
EXCLUSIVE: RSBF first ever MOVIE REVIEW
I WENT TO GO SEE GARDEN STATE LAST NITE with a Certain Mystery Lady. Before I tell you about how corny it was, I will first tell you something that you may find of EXTREME INTEREST as a reader of this blog: They used the words "Random" and "Sketchy" several times, thus redeeming what might have been a TOTAL WASTE OF TIME. Once Zach Braff said to this other dude: "DUDE WHY ARE YOU TAKING US TO THIS SKETCHY CANYON IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE?" and I think I remember Natalie Portman as describing herself as TOTALLY RANDOM at one point. She was OK, kind of playing a "YOUNGER IN SPIRIT" character than she usually does. I was quite dismayed not to hear anyone use the "brainfart" code, but the characters certainly participated in the action of brainfarting.
Anyway I kind of lost some steam on dissing this film, I don't know if I FEEL LIKE DOING IT ANYMORE.
RoCKY
Anyway I kind of lost some steam on dissing this film, I don't know if I FEEL LIKE DOING IT ANYMORE.
RoCKY
Wednesday, August 04, 2004
Pump Up the Volume
Greetings from a certain mystery lady!
Today I would like to call your attention to my insane downstairs neighbor. She is a total LUNATIC to the Nth degree. On Saturday morning, I got out of bed and she started RAP RAP RAPPING on my floor (her ceiling) with a broom. DUDES! Am I supposed to stay in bed all day? It was 11am!!! WTF? So, I totally stayed in bed for a little while, but then it was like, "No! This is my apt! I need to go to the bathroom!" When I stepped on the floor, she started banging again. RAP RAP RAP RAP! I walked barefoot to the bathroom and returned to my room and more banging. A few moments later, this insane lady is banging at my door, telling me she's trying to sleep and I do this every Saturday. What? I've only lived here two weeks lady and last weekend I was hanging with the Brainfart dudes! She tells me to keep it down, she works at nights, THERE'S A BABY DOWNSTAIRS, etc. CAN'T I HEAR HER BANGING?!?
Yeah, I can hear you. QUIT MAKING SUCH A RACKET, LADY!
Meanwhile I'm not opening the door, which really pisses her off. "OPEN THE F-ING DOOR!" She screams.
Uh, no. I don't open the door to cursing angry PSYCHOS. Unfortunately I live above one.
xox Mystery Lady
Today I would like to call your attention to my insane downstairs neighbor. She is a total LUNATIC to the Nth degree. On Saturday morning, I got out of bed and she started RAP RAP RAPPING on my floor (her ceiling) with a broom. DUDES! Am I supposed to stay in bed all day? It was 11am!!! WTF? So, I totally stayed in bed for a little while, but then it was like, "No! This is my apt! I need to go to the bathroom!" When I stepped on the floor, she started banging again. RAP RAP RAP RAP! I walked barefoot to the bathroom and returned to my room and more banging. A few moments later, this insane lady is banging at my door, telling me she's trying to sleep and I do this every Saturday. What? I've only lived here two weeks lady and last weekend I was hanging with the Brainfart dudes! She tells me to keep it down, she works at nights, THERE'S A BABY DOWNSTAIRS, etc. CAN'T I HEAR HER BANGING?!?
Yeah, I can hear you. QUIT MAKING SUCH A RACKET, LADY!
Meanwhile I'm not opening the door, which really pisses her off. "OPEN THE F-ING DOOR!" She screams.
Uh, no. I don't open the door to cursing angry PSYCHOS. Unfortunately I live above one.
xox Mystery Lady
I'M SICK of people touching my laptop screen with their dirty ass fingerS!!!!
A little shout to KOJAK UP IN THE HZZY for taking note of a major socialogickal division. YO. Back when I grew up in SANTA FE NUEVO MEXICO!!!!!! :_ &_=^$#@#^&* i noticed these things. My mental struggle manifested itself in my footwear as it has since my childhood (see the chapters on screaming tantrums on the floors of FOOTLOCKER because the velcro wouldn't get tight enough in my life history book)
AnyWAY! As he said, or as I might interpret it, there are the TWO POLAR OPPOSITES OF LIFE Y'ALL. When you buy shoes in a place that offers any sort of aspiration to outdoor endeavours (SEE atle etc.) You must consider the option of buying the "rugged" shoe. Or at least the shoe that can handle a bit of dirt (SEE the nike ACG). Its simply irresponsible not to do so. AT THE SAME TIME WHAT YOU REALLY WANT TO DO IS GET SOME REALLY DOPE ASS SNEAKERS THAT HAVE ZERO FUNCTION IN NATURE. But they DO have style points and they are well suited to the growing world's urban character. So what do you do?
Well friends, that's precisely why i moved to the BIG APPLE. I'm taking a bite out of the city that offers almost no nature and I FEEL JUST FINE GETTING THE SHOES THAT ARE BUILT FOR IT.
I do miss the sunsets, the clean air, the grass and the tress though
PEACE
rOCKy
AnyWAY! As he said, or as I might interpret it, there are the TWO POLAR OPPOSITES OF LIFE Y'ALL. When you buy shoes in a place that offers any sort of aspiration to outdoor endeavours (SEE atle etc.) You must consider the option of buying the "rugged" shoe. Or at least the shoe that can handle a bit of dirt (SEE the nike ACG). Its simply irresponsible not to do so. AT THE SAME TIME WHAT YOU REALLY WANT TO DO IS GET SOME REALLY DOPE ASS SNEAKERS THAT HAVE ZERO FUNCTION IN NATURE. But they DO have style points and they are well suited to the growing world's urban character. So what do you do?
Well friends, that's precisely why i moved to the BIG APPLE. I'm taking a bite out of the city that offers almost no nature and I FEEL JUST FINE GETTING THE SHOES THAT ARE BUILT FOR IT.
I do miss the sunsets, the clean air, the grass and the tress though
PEACE
rOCKy
on the subject of DIFFERENT TYPE MALES AND FEMALES
First of all a major shout out to NEW BLOGGER logan.....S*H*O*U*T*
Second of all I would like to touch on a theme started earlier about different types of DUDES AND GALS.
Upon oservation and careful consideration I would say that I am a NON-SEATTLE TYPE DUDE. The way I see it the people who are SEATTLE TYPE MALES around my age group come in two forms as follows. One would be the ACTION-HIPPY type that always dresses in a way so a s to be prepared for adverse weather (for example WOOL socks) and climbs mountains with only HOMEMADE VEGAN SNACKS. The second type tries to be like the ultimate WEST_COAST STYLE with a cross between MOTORCYCLE TYPE and SURFER DUDE STYLES. They will very often play in a band but what I am saying is that THIS DOES NOT MAKE YOU AS COOL AS SEAN PENN, he was in the movies for godssakes!!
But actually who would really care about all of this if it were not for the fact many SEATTLE TYPE FEMALES are actually seen hanging out (OR WORSE) with these type dudes. There is no subway here but even worse Seattle type females are too often seen RIDING IN PRIVATE AUTOMIBLES with seattle type males. Don't take my word for it: Ask Rocky about a cute chick we saw with some dude in a pick-up truck: I totally stole his parking spot : SO THERE!!!!
KoJAMZ (aka kojak)
Second of all I would like to touch on a theme started earlier about different types of DUDES AND GALS.
Upon oservation and careful consideration I would say that I am a NON-SEATTLE TYPE DUDE. The way I see it the people who are SEATTLE TYPE MALES around my age group come in two forms as follows. One would be the ACTION-HIPPY type that always dresses in a way so a s to be prepared for adverse weather (for example WOOL socks) and climbs mountains with only HOMEMADE VEGAN SNACKS. The second type tries to be like the ultimate WEST_COAST STYLE with a cross between MOTORCYCLE TYPE and SURFER DUDE STYLES. They will very often play in a band but what I am saying is that THIS DOES NOT MAKE YOU AS COOL AS SEAN PENN, he was in the movies for godssakes!!
But actually who would really care about all of this if it were not for the fact many SEATTLE TYPE FEMALES are actually seen hanging out (OR WORSE) with these type dudes. There is no subway here but even worse Seattle type females are too often seen RIDING IN PRIVATE AUTOMIBLES with seattle type males. Don't take my word for it: Ask Rocky about a cute chick we saw with some dude in a pick-up truck: I totally stole his parking spot : SO THERE!!!!
KoJAMZ (aka kojak)
Monday, August 02, 2004
REAL PRACTICE
My name is LOGAN and it's a combination of LOG and SHOGUN, never
mind the SPELLING. Somebody I play STREETBALL (styled just so, but
inside St.Patricks' gym) with told me once that if you aspire to be
a REAL WRITER, you should have a weblog for practice, so that you
write something EVERY DAY and make it INTERESTING. I told him in
response, in between wicked drives to the hoop, that I'd rather
SCORE (wink), and besides I don't have anything to SAY. Let it be
SAID: I don't have anything to SAY, let alone sayings of interest.
Not that I'm trying to be a REAL WRITER anyway; anyway what is a
REAL WRITER, i ask you, Friends, Rocky, Friends, Kojak: what is a
REAL WRITER? Is it someone who writes outside of UNREAL HYPER CYBER
SPACE in a BRICKS AND MORTAR fashion, as in LEAD PENCIL TO NOTEBOOK
PAPER, or is it someone who type type types ANYWHERE they can, or
is it someone who purports, alldaylong, to TELL THE TRUTH so HELP
THEM GOD? If I am anything at all I am a TRUTHTELLER, just ask my
hoopmates, who are Man hattan type males. I am a NON-MAN HATTAN
type female, with certain thirdcoastal longings, and I neither COME
FROM Spring St or GO TO Spring St., I DO BOTH. Explain that. As I
come and go on Monday mornings I file the men into man hattan types
and non. Rocky with a sunburn is such a one , EVEN in hoboken. man
hatten: Is it the sunburn or the hair, the glasses or the shoes?
Where are the beaches better than in Hoboken, I say? Certainly NOT
in the heady Hamptons, where Rocky mismanaged his sunscreen: to
sport a sunburn in Hoboken is to HOT, HOT, HOT. Rocky and I
mismanaged guacamole in Hoboken with another woman who knows how to
scorn the Hamptons and sunburns. Hint to the Hoboken-aspirant
ladies: you might also want california hair, a skinshirt, and fussy
shoes. FUSSY shoes are like, you know, ones you can't walk so hot
in, even though you wear them to look SO HOT. Aside from the
laides of befussed footwear , this new jersey hamlet also sports a
HOT skyline, man it is delicious, standing under a blue moon next
to the circus lodgings, aweing at the rigid humps of Manhatten
running down the hudson like the formidible spines of a WICKED SEA
SERPENT. This is why I wear my basketball shoes EVERYWHERE, even in
bars, in case I have to run.
i'm out. Logan
mind the SPELLING. Somebody I play STREETBALL (styled just so, but
inside St.Patricks' gym) with told me once that if you aspire to be
a REAL WRITER, you should have a weblog for practice, so that you
write something EVERY DAY and make it INTERESTING. I told him in
response, in between wicked drives to the hoop, that I'd rather
SCORE (wink), and besides I don't have anything to SAY. Let it be
SAID: I don't have anything to SAY, let alone sayings of interest.
Not that I'm trying to be a REAL WRITER anyway; anyway what is a
REAL WRITER, i ask you, Friends, Rocky, Friends, Kojak: what is a
REAL WRITER? Is it someone who writes outside of UNREAL HYPER CYBER
SPACE in a BRICKS AND MORTAR fashion, as in LEAD PENCIL TO NOTEBOOK
PAPER, or is it someone who type type types ANYWHERE they can, or
is it someone who purports, alldaylong, to TELL THE TRUTH so HELP
THEM GOD? If I am anything at all I am a TRUTHTELLER, just ask my
hoopmates, who are Man hattan type males. I am a NON-MAN HATTAN
type female, with certain thirdcoastal longings, and I neither COME
FROM Spring St or GO TO Spring St., I DO BOTH. Explain that. As I
come and go on Monday mornings I file the men into man hattan types
and non. Rocky with a sunburn is such a one , EVEN in hoboken. man
hatten: Is it the sunburn or the hair, the glasses or the shoes?
Where are the beaches better than in Hoboken, I say? Certainly NOT
in the heady Hamptons, where Rocky mismanaged his sunscreen: to
sport a sunburn in Hoboken is to HOT, HOT, HOT. Rocky and I
mismanaged guacamole in Hoboken with another woman who knows how to
scorn the Hamptons and sunburns. Hint to the Hoboken-aspirant
ladies: you might also want california hair, a skinshirt, and fussy
shoes. FUSSY shoes are like, you know, ones you can't walk so hot
in, even though you wear them to look SO HOT. Aside from the
laides of befussed footwear , this new jersey hamlet also sports a
HOT skyline, man it is delicious, standing under a blue moon next
to the circus lodgings, aweing at the rigid humps of Manhatten
running down the hudson like the formidible spines of a WICKED SEA
SERPENT. This is why I wear my basketball shoes EVERYWHERE, even in
bars, in case I have to run.
i'm out. Logan
Sunday, August 01, 2004
BURN"T BY THE RAYS OF THE SUN Y'ALL
can U tell me a little something about WHICH DAMN SUNSCREEN I NEED TO USE? Now I heard that the SCIENTISTs that figure stuff out had discovered that 15 SUNSCREEN IS THE MOST YOU CAN POSSIBLY USE!!!! But after a day of roasting my ass off on the beach I am inclined to disagree with those findings. Was it really 30? BEcause I know that wearing 45 SPF sunscreen is a stinking load of horse manure meant to ease the minds of hypochondriacs.
At the beach its a good idea to bring an umbrella, but unfortunately this isn't always possible, because a good unbrella weighs upwards of 10 LBS. And it can be quite cumbersome. So I suggest you just BURY YOURSELF IN THE SAND. Thats what I did, I got about 15 little kids to bury me neck deep in the sand so as to protect me (JUST KIDDING YALL!) But I do think its a good IDEA, and maybe if I WOULD HAVE DONE THAT, then I wouldn't be in such pain now.
ROckY :% :/(()*^
At the beach its a good idea to bring an umbrella, but unfortunately this isn't always possible, because a good unbrella weighs upwards of 10 LBS. And it can be quite cumbersome. So I suggest you just BURY YOURSELF IN THE SAND. Thats what I did, I got about 15 little kids to bury me neck deep in the sand so as to protect me (JUST KIDDING YALL!) But I do think its a good IDEA, and maybe if I WOULD HAVE DONE THAT, then I wouldn't be in such pain now.
ROckY :% :/(()*^
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