Thursday "Zinger"

Is that your face or did your neck reach out and grab someone else's face, and put it over your face so that you appear like someone else
Rocky Zingnamic

growing up is hard to do

just got back from a little vacation and boy was that fun.  relaxing in the care of the parents with all comforts and just kicking back .  Makes it feel like summer vacation and a kid again!

back to reality now and it's almost 2 much- the plagues of modern life include (previosuly described by Kafka and Kojak) dealings with the bureaucracies of airline and apartments , issues of $$$ and most difficult of all trying to nurse  a sick cat back  to life.  Also there's going to work which ironically enough I am avoiding right now!  

But hey would you look at that now  sick cat is eating something  ! ( knock on  wood no JINX) I'll cross my fingers and hope for positive developments in the future

craigsLIST HIJINKS

I am selling this little red bike my friend found on the street for 25 bucks. Here is the post
This is a very stylish little bike. It has handbrakes, a freewheel and a nice little rack on the back. It is made in the style of a folding bike, but it should be noted that it does not have a hinge to fold on.
It needs some attention- the front wheel is a bit wobbly, the chain/crank needs adjustment as it slips a bit on while pedaling. Currently one tires is flat.
If you want to make a little project out of it (or have a shop fix it) this bike could be the coolest. I wish I could keep it but I don't have the time or space.
The following is a crazy craiglister who's email name is "ihfghfghzs /"
-==
I am very interested. Don't know where to fix it ok but it should fit me and my pockets.

please contact for sale arrangement and do be human about it: not coldblooded 'first come first serve' so that when i take the subway all the way to see and pick up AFTER HAVING MADE A SOLID APPOINTMENT, you say, oh, som' jus pickit! (This is one of the reasons i am FOR gun control. I could have shot three idiot craigslist bike sellers!)

regards

betty
so I write back
I am waiting for a confirmation to show the bike tomorrow evening. If you would like to see it, please let me know when you are available. If before or during tomorrow eve and I don't get a confirm ...BLA BLA BLA nice nice nice

==
The other appointment i mentioned fell through so I tell her. Then she writes back with her phone number. I call her and leave a message on a machine that has no name and a very foreign voice. She calls me back and wants to talk a long time and about the bike. It turns out her name is NOT BETTY (this is just a fake name she gives to "Crazy" bike sellers on craigslist). It looks like I am earning her trust.

I tell her- its just "As is" if you want to see it. She tells me she is living in "Bed Stoo" and that she is from Canada- yet her accent was very much like Bjork's... she says she keeps buying bikes, but what she really wants is her "beautiful" bike in Canada. She cannot see the bike today cuz its RAINING(???wtf?). and she wants to walk FROM Bed Stoo to Greenpoint (is that near williamsburg? yes duh) -and that is way too far! So at the end of the conversation she reveals her name is ISABELLA and not Betty. So ANYWAY it stopped rainig later and I want to get rid of this thing so I call her. I ask for Isabella- she says "you have the wrong number" and starts to hang up in paranoia-and I'm like its ME with the bike. and I say I want to show it tonite, if you can't do it, I may show it to someone else. Then she says Oh my friend told me YESTERDAY that its too expensive to fix, so I don't want it anyway.

YOU FREAK! Anyway here is the real kicker I was going to call the next person on the list and I ACCIDENTLLY dialed Betty or Isabella or whoever she is again, woops I realized so I just hung up. THEN SHE CALLS ME BACK ONCE. I don't pick up, she hangs up and 2 rings. THEN SHE CALLS ME BACK AGAIN! and I let it go to the answer. I listen to the answermachine. She says- "I told you I didn't want the bike. My friend says its going to cost 40 or maybe even 60 dollars to fix." then she says. "Do not ever call us again" can I say this again- FREAK! I was thinking about writing something like this:

"I just don't understand why you don't want this bike. First you way one thing and then another> I want to meet you face to face. If you give me 10 good reasons for not wanting this perfectly good bike, I might let it go. But this is unnacceptable. I need to know who you are and I need to see some papers. I need to know you nationality and full name or else I am calling the police. Until then I will continue to call until you talk with me sensibly." KIDDING. how do you think she's react? ??? PSYCHOPATH

Yes! a classic day of Two postings by the one and only FAMOUS haikU ROcky

Euro cup and beer
The two go to the (garden?)
Or? Where els is good?

The first ever in history future related HaikUZNICH-R

A story of woe that has resolved into Symphony

A simple search for the word "bike" on this blog will reveal that it is a subject of utmost importance.

ANd now I would like to tell you a story of that began with WOE. Many of you may remember BLUE GOLDFISH Now be ready to cry a stream of tears as long as the Mississippi. Blue goldfish (I refer to the bike) was stolen by an unknown not0good person. This is how it happened. I went to visit my girlfriend at the plant store I left the bike outside and unlucked and unlocked. and 5 minutes I sh*&*^%t you not later it was gone and no where to be seen. NOw an interesting addendum to the story. A couple weeks ago Mr xroomate was riding over the bridge and he passes crosswise someone who had a nice bike (BLUE GOLDFISH) stop your jaw from dropping becuase there is more. He followed the evil doer into the deepest queensbridge projects of astoria and CALLED ME DURING THE HI-SPPEEED PURSUIT! If cours I was FLAGERGASTED and Didn't know what to do! Anyway he saw the guy take it into the projects and the dude looked very tough so he didn't RISK his LIFE.

So I found the O.G. police report and called teh police I even did some research (finding PHOTOGRAFS) so I could prove the bike was mine. Lo the only such existing photographs of Blue GOldfish were in fact TAKEN by CERMAK and pictured I, Rocky and THE HONORABLE JUDGE KOJAK standing behind a peaceful and seren pastoral lake atmosphere in CENTral park! And yet even with the peices of the evidence, the police, as is there TYPICAL style told me TOUGH luck there is nothing we can do. (Ieven talked to a detective) LAAAAAAME!

Now to end the story in happiness I have a new bike, it was cheaper (of course its not as much of a racer as bluegfish, but I allready like it a lot. PLUS I INTALLED HOT RED BRAKE HOODS THe color of the new bike? WHITE, so if any one hasideas for a name?Rocky

Things are going to get BETtER

Hey- I just want to say- I think We all have room for improvement, and one of those people is me Rocky. I sometimes look at these entries and I just feel like, I could be doing a better job of describing whats going on in reality. Yezs BRAINFARTING is healty but also yes DO PEOPLE EVEN CARE ABOUT certain types of NONSENS no because they arne't insiide your mind to actually SMELL the brainfart. Don't worry I'm not getting all emotional, but I have an ideas and I will improve and thats a PLEDGE.

for example: HERE Is a keen obesrvation: Birds. birdwatching is fun. I saw a CARDINAL. I have alos seen a CORMORANT, SWALLOW, SPARROW, SBARRO, STARLING, and a FLICKER, and BLACK CROWNED NIGHT HERON. 0ne of those things is not a bird and has to do with Pizza. I'll give you one hour to figure it out
R

The complete yuppie experience

I am at a coffe caffe early in the morning, just sitting here on my Mac book Typing on my blog. This coffee shure is strong. And they are playing Suzanne Vega. Everything is good. Later I will Get in my Lexus Car and drive down to the yacht club. Maybe I'll have a Farm Raised BLT and a Mimosa. This is the HIGH LIFE let me tell you. But the only way I was able to attain such HIGHTS is by selling MySoul (MSL) on Nasdaq. and the price just went up 200 points today.
just kidding. it went up 300 points
RockyANDO]

need a vacation?

I'll be taking 1 soon how Bout you? 1 week from tomorrow my companion and I will be on our way to lovely _MAYBE EVEN LIVELY vermont. it's raining here and I can't wait to see what awaits on the other side. If the weather is nice we'll even build a tent platform suitable for camping in the backyard. OLD school - grade school style except the yard's big (LAND) so it's more legit.


*****ROCKY YOU SHOULD COME IF YOU CAN MAKE IT OUT of the city you call home********
We would welcome any visitors from 6/18 - 6/21!

Food Experiments

1. Ingredients: package of raspberries, greekk style grape leaves, CHEESE slices. Put together in black bag and go out for a picnic. Food that is not eaten should be placed at the bottom of bag and covered by other articles so it can be forgotten about. Place black bag in bedroom (preferably in a sunny spot) and allow to sit for 4 days. Unpack bag and discover a wonderful surprise.

2. Pour a beaker full of water add one GUMMY bear. Let it sit there and it will get huge.

R