Friday, December 31, 2004

SHADY business (new years resolutions)

SO I've been hanging around with "FAMILY" alot OF LATE and 1 thing that often comes up in that type of a discussion setting is different stuff for the HUMBLE Household AND than maybe where it was PURCHASED (if not homemade) <- [ recommended by RSBF!! ]..
Theres 1 store where which is EPONYMOUS to this post - YES U guessed it its called SHADY BUSINESS ! and "no what??" they sell LAMPSHADES.....
˙ˆ˚˚˚˚˚˚ that brings me to the RESOLUTIONS
First of all, its only a matter of time before they make a store called by Sum COmbination of random, sketchy, AND/OR brainfart. After all there is alreay ANTROPOLOGY and I think METAPHYSICS so alot of important concepts seem to be getting UTILIZED in some "SHADY" ways. Therefore, I resolve to ask the RSBF CREW the following: "should we ESTABLISH the freakin store first or just wait for someone else 2 then SUE them????

Next RESOLUTION: BLOG MORE (I'm really sorry about this PEOPLE :::(((((

LAst REsolution: FIGURe out ways 2 help human BEINNGS and other life forms to LIVE LIFE - even if its indirectly... THis is a tough one but the most IMPORTANT thing is that it not be VICE VERSA : to paraphrase someone on a CD that rocky lent once: "EVERYONE STAY ALIVE IN THE '05 AND NOT DIE"

•••••••kojak

wearing Sunglasses in airport

JEEX if you ever want to look like a criminal here is some advice. WEHR YOUR SUNGLASSES IN AN AIRPOrt and then when you go thru the thing keep your computer on IN SLEEP MODE and it will set off ALARmz. ANd then travel to new york on New Years EVE. can there Be anything more suspicious. R U Ready for NEW YEERs???

I am::: I have a bottle of champagne in my carry on and if I GET STUCK IN traffic on the way. I AM GOING to

™™™™™™™™™™™™™™POP THE TOP™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™™

rocky______________________________

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Update From DreamState

HERE in NM I am dreaming a bit more. FOR EXAMPLE: I had this dream that I was working on some project at work and my boss said to revise and then he said, just forget the whole thing and then I SAid something to the effect of cursing him OUT and walked off and then i REALIZed that I better Quit, before i get fired

and then i wallked HOMe but my aprtment was not where it usually is, IN fact the WHOLE building was across the street, and it was ONTOP of the building accross the street , someone told me it was cuz they Were filming a movie where i lived.

And then i saw one of my old teachers and She was waving a flier in the air. and SHe said ROCKY you supported this DIDN"T YOU = YOU WENT TO THIS PLAY _ this is against everything we stand for here and I said Damn rite i Did. ANd then i though GOD i am REALLY gonna get fired now.! and then i think we made out

More dreams too, can't remember, but I THINK I MITE BE GETTING IN TOUCH WITH MY SUBCONCIOUS /

I would like to send all love to SE asia

ROCKY

Friday, December 24, 2004

I AM GOING TO EXPLODE GARRISON KEELOR_happy holidaya

That guy is such a JOKER. I am going to LAKE WO_blow THE FRE***K UP gone. He is the most inane LAME, BRAIN DEAD wak ASS out there. I saw his tired ass ON charly ROSES LST nite, g*SH intolerable his voice OH lord its like strangling!. THERE IS ALMOST NOTHING IN THIS GOD FORSAKEN PLANET THAT INCITES AS MUCh HATRED AN ANGER IN ME AS GARRISON KEELOR - except FOr possibly TOM petty.

Maybe I am so crothcety cuz everyone just strate UP LEFT ME TO FEND 4 myself today and went to tHERe MAGIC familyLands. Well guess what i am LEaving 2morow SO THERe

PEACE ON eartH!!!

rocky

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Hello nice snowlakes

I have recently been AFUERA from where I usiauly look at the computer and then I blank plane OFFORTGOTTEN that it even existed but i read all the blogs that i had missde about joe and the other nice snowflakes and of their idienty. But waht i wasreally thinging is that when you feel all jumb;led and ratpants kriznoppling disturbed in su cuerpo or su mind. then you just makd some time in your self to let those jumlbe messes crystalize into beautiful snowflakes. even if you cant see them they may sitll be existing in a place that your eyes dont see.. (parallel universes may be less than centimeteres awya)
the song is "if only you believe like i believe baby" but the singer is refering to romance not to imAGINARY REAL snoe flacs.
anyways i told rocky about my green suspenders which he said to BLOG ON . and i have been wearing them and i like them so until you see someone with green suspenders you wont know which the sita pants theyar e attached to
happy22nd of decemb.

Uf Mein Eyez!!!

yesterday was THE company party, and MANY hilarious Antics ensued UNDOUBTABLY. A whole LOT of getting wasted AND drinking shots out of a trophy? BBOOOOOYA. I would like to tell yu about the "HOLIDAY SPIRIT" and how My theory about how it is based in New York and exported ellsehweres. Or maybe its a product oF the "corporatE" america. NOT THAT THERE"S anything wrong with that, Cuz i am not just talkin about the spending and What not; like i did a few days ago. I AM TALKING, people. ABOUT THE SPIRIT. I think THE SPIRIT is a bit like the seasonal or SpiRitual equivalent to alcoholization;

if you haven't noticed I have become THE WORLDS LEADING SCIENTIST THAT KNOWS """THE TRUTH ABOUT ALL THINGS""""

don't fite over the xmas turkey and I hope you didn't fite over the Matzoh ball soup and I really hope you don't fite over the yams and what not.

OH GOD I JUST THOUGHT OF SOMEHTING. If you haven't heard there is a new "Stylish" holdiday called Krispica (which is obviously a combo hoilday). BytheWay that name MAKES ME WANT TO CHUKE MY BRAINS OUT. anyway i heard it was famous cuz they celebrated it on the OC or something.

rocky

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

christmas time is HERE

logan is twirling about in the space where it _really_ lives, that is, outer. I feel I can safely reveal my extra-worldly identity without revealing any of the life threatening secrets that accompany my lifestyle. how did i miss this 75 USD blowout night of PUNK DOOOOM. ? oh, i was flying (i mean walking) down conselya st -- where there are live elves i am not kidding if you can take the 3rd case and make it ELF and REINDEER and XMAS OTHERS you know what to expect when you see CONSELYA st at this time of year. which reminds me that someman recently pointed out how weirdly sad all xmas tv specials are, like the elf in the old rudolph not really claymation one, who wishes he were a dentist. i bet there are alot of dentists out there wishing to be elves. which reminds me i wanted to propose a blogover - pink is really a very corporate color after all isn't it? why not black background w/ green? after all the infiltrations and ridiculous identity talk I recommend first the blogover and FINALLY AT LONG LAST RENEWED RESEARCH into the 3RD CASE, the SUPER, the PUNCHINTHESTOMACH WHOMP way to git your message across, over and out. ?! wir mussen uns schutzen. pass auf !

∞∞_¬•vI__™

due to recent crises the following shrot message will b IN CODED WITH SECRECSY::

the gnu year "april May" bring a knew HOPE.
but don't u let ***THE MAN**** tel ewe ˆh¶o•w'
to "William Tell" thyme.

rock_________y
(buNdlEd UP))))))))))))))
*($*^%&A^

Sunday, December 19, 2004

SECRET santa reveals SECRETS

wow I feel like this is an END OF the season spectular on the RsBFART- kind of like sometimes on TV like SUPERBOWLS - (everyone is psyched and READERS are writing in and people are trying to PREDICT what will happen next )

so I' d like to UNRavel the plot a little more ˙ˆ˙ˆˆ∆˜øˆ∆¬˚∆ˆ∆¬ˆ - like on Xfiles when the found out that SCULLy was really a alien life form.

So basically what ROCKY said about real names is TRUE!!! my real name is KOJAK TRIGINOPOLAS
........its LITHUANIAN

also, several people have contacted us about people saying to them "hey kojak that was a brilliiant blog" and they just play it off and say "thanks" but NO ONE really knows who we really R.

ALSo the RSBF NETWORK is impossible to pin down in actuality. I have a friend who Knows alot about HACKING & get this: someone set up a computer in the middle of the wilderness and turned in on and WITHIN 4 MINUTEs some hackers took control of the computer. THis is the kind of stuff we could do if we have 2....
DON't FORGET 3rd CASE ∆¥˙†©©˚∆˚ - its a new langauge that can reach the INTERNET without a computer...EVEN IF WE WERE LOCKED DOWN we could send out 3rd case using a LIGHT SWITCH and a BROKEN FLOURESCENT LIGHT BULB.........˙øˆˆ˚øˆ˚˚ø˚øø˚˚ø˚øø˚

(CONNECT THE FREAKIN DOTS PEOPLE !!!!!)kojak

Friday, December 17, 2004

WHERES THE FUCKING MONEY YOU OWE ME?

btw thats kojak's saying above, but i thought it mite be appropriate to describe what happened to me last nite. I guess it would be something I say TO GOD or to NEW YORK CITY. I apologize to all of our young readers that had to be exposed to that explitive, but i am serious when i say::: SOMETIMES YOU REALLY CAN'T EXPRESS YOURSELF UNLESS YOU USE CAPITAL LETTERS AND CURSE WORDS

this is the Story i got 100 bux from mr. ATM. and i woke up this morning and guess how much i have now---Ω
25 bucx so let me do a little break down for you. HERe we go ;;SCHOOL 101

100 dollars of UNITED STAtes CURrency
- XXX dollars of that VERY SAME CURRENCY
_____________________________________________
25 BUX (same as dollars - just another word)))

hint: don't forget to "carry" the 1. The answer will be revealed next week

I won't go into how i spent all that money. but i will complain about it ALL DAY TO EVERYONE I MEET. I hope you can TAKE IT!!!!!!!! if you meet me today (your gonna heare about it)

rocky

Thursday, December 16, 2004

punk rock SABBATICAL!

crazy cats of the RANDOM SKETCHY sphere,

I'm back from an enlightening sabbatical with some nyc PUNK ROCKERS. what did I research during my sabbatical, do you ask? let me break it down into laymen's terms. I analyzed the SOCIO-ECONOMIC STATE of the L.E.S., the joys of ENDLESS free beer, and the ART OF CHAOS. with a focus on the last item. our chaos research included doing ROCK 'n' ROLL KICKS IN THE MIDDLE OF A PACKED BAR, talking to EVERYONE on the streets about RANDOM and sometimes SKETCHY subjects, making out in bathrooms to keep the kids from doing drugs, getting $1 lapdances from EXECUTIVE PEOPLE, & knocking over TALL GLASSES OF WATER (mostly onto ourselves). I don't believe I've gotten so many DIRTY LOOKS from fellow bar-goers in one year as I did in just ONE NIGHT OF PUNK ROCK! I am at most times a polite individual, who says 'excuse me' and 'thank you' even in the rowdiest of bars. but I was there for the sake of some RADICAL REAL RESEARCH, so I did what needed to be done in the name of the RADICAL and the REAL.

RAWK!

p.s. - to the rude dude from SF: ROCKY was born ROCKY. I was there when it happened.

-intoccabile

BTW its CRUNCH TIME

BTW its CRUNCH TIME


You MAY well know taht some of the holidays are coming up and SOME HAVE ALLREADY STARTED. ARE YOU PREPARED TO HELP FUEL OUR ECONOMY??? WELL YOU BETTER BE CUZ ITS PRESENT BUYING TIME. ITS TIME TO GET YOUR BUTT OUT THE DOOR AND INTO THE (freezing) COLD AND START SPENDING THE MOTHAF**KIN CASH CUZ PEOPLE WANTS PRESENTS AND THEY WANTS THEM THIS HOLIDAY SEASON>>>>>>>>>>>>

A few gift suggestions from someone who "NOSE".

for the young OR THE YOUNG AT HEART:::: TOYZ

FOR THE OLD or the weary:::: a book or a warm balnket

FOR THat ""CRAZY OLD AUNT THAT WON"T STOP KISSING YOU??""""" a flyswatter!!!!!!!!!

4 YOUR FAMILY::::::: LOTS OF LUV __________________CAPITAL "L" "U" "V"

some people question(?) THE SYSTEM and they say Y BUY when I can show THE LOVE by making these things. Sita Pants is ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE:: you may have seen this person's HAND MADE CRAFTS adorning my head RECENTLY. and you probably complimented me on it CUZ IT RULEZ.

4 those of us WHO LIVE INSIDE OF A BIG APPLE its almost UNHEARD OF TO ""make"" prezents cuz we have so many great items at our finger tips. BUt ITS REALLY SOMTHING TO CONSIDER,,,, maybe U could take some trash and RAT SKELETONs and make a DECORATIVE BROCHE

ROCKYU



Wednesday, December 15, 2004

most uncormfortable Moment of the good year blimp

here is a great way to make someone feel quite uncomFortable. Its very simple. All you have to do is just start singing to them and jsut look them right in the eye and just KEEP ON SINGING. When someone does this to me there is NO POSSIBLE THING YOU CAN DO TO MAKE YOURSELF NOT UNCOMFORTABLE. Theyre jsut looking at you and singing and unless you want to join in a harmonius DUET. (Which is NOT my personal STyle) You can jsut sit there and look away or look at them and try to just grit your teeth and GRIN and BEAR it. On the other side they can DO whatever they want, they can just REALLY HAM IT UP!@! GET REALLY into their song and get really thespian style act in out Get REALL passionate with their eyes. and YOU are POWERELESS as long as they continue to Look DEEP INTO YOUR SOUL (thru your eyes)

I think my next PLAN of axion will be to just to HONK THEIR NOSE and that mite get them to STOP IT, just let me go !!!
PUH LEEAZ!!

O+)(<><><∑••••–––••••{•:-----::::•••---

rocky

Saturday, December 11, 2004

how 2 communicate w/ ANIMAL life

I have a couple TRIX i somtimes use to conversate with animals. Not really on the level of debate on ABSTRACT TOPIX but more just like a general BACK and FORTH (tet-a-tet :::a la francaise)
Dig if you will the picture:::I was reading a book at my local CAFE - everyone knows its the PLACE for the most intelligent life around. Next thing you know someone brought in a CUTE DOG to order their coffee with them. It was either a PUPPY or just a small dog like a JACk russel. SO I started tapping my toe really discreatly - using a style that the people didn;t notice but the dog did. Actually it got so HAPPY it just about started freaking out. It barked and JUMped UP and people were like WTF (?!?) - - THEY DIDN"T EVEN KNOW THAT WE WERE CONVERSATING.
^^^^^^^^^^kojak

Friday, December 10, 2004

the other life

sometimes i think we are aliens when we sleep. all that life i live while my eyes are closed -- i kill people , ( ha ha ha), i see other people killed, i engage in all kinds of DRAMA never known to me in the day time. in my dreams i get married again and again. what is happening here? no, i will not listen to freud, who was an alien who was a good storyteller. what i am curious about is how would we draw aliens today, aside from the visages of those IN POWER? remember when martians were always green? did you know green is the color of hope? why green? why not purple? a purple robot cockroach.
so i just watched The ARt and Science of Aquarium Maintenence on Implausibot.com and i am wondering how mr rocky de grieve got to be wes anderson before wes anderson was ??? WA w/ perhaps , even, more , 'serious' themes ? when is the full motion picture feature coming out, Implausibot ? ? ?
i have a friend named ryan powers and oftentimes i think we should all just change our last name to Powers. day and night, powers.

Lo to the G A N . (if there were a certain ping pong tournament in January, ,i would totally be in training so i could win that thing to the shame shock and appalation of all ping pong pros)

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

ri=obo===Nucleic

All this talk about ALIENS makes me remember some of the "HI QUALITY"" conversations I had in the UnderGraduate Years of MY life. Seeing as how most of the people who read this blog are most likely on their SECONDARY OR TERTIARY Levels of schooling, these old conversations may seem like OLD NEWZ but let me assure you THEY are NOT. Lets talk for a moment about the possibility of creating a ROBOT COCKROACH, this is something that me and little Black were discussing the other day. In his professional opinion. ITS IM POSSI BLE. but I tend to dissagree. Now I am not talking about no Remote controlled Cockroach either, i mean a traditional metal transformer style cockroach. Well as you can allready tell from the copious amounts of scientific evidence I've given you that a debate like this COULD LAST 4 EVA. at least until we see robot cockroaches infesting our food supplies.

But Heres the more important questions::::::::::::::::::::Y R Peeps So concerned with other "intelligent" life. Lets talk for a while about the YEARS OF COMPETITION AND JEALOUSY that humans had with THE APES. or the ULTIMATE FEARthat people have that Alienz may or may not have allready infiltrated the govern,ment and are trying to continue a useless war with IRAQ. or perhaps that eerie way that dolphin will look at you whil you are Swiimming and then IT WILL ATTACK ESPECCIALLY IF YOU ARE PREGGARS OR OTHERWISE KNOCKED UP :)

So why then? GENERAL INSECURITY? pride and teh HOPE THAT if there was an INTERSPECIAL INTER-AUTONOUMOUS LIFE form Sack race between monkeys Dolphins, robot cockroaches, people and, aliensz. that SOME HOW *WILL Ferile* mite intervene and Help TOMMY LEE jonez create some sort of "Magic Sack" that would help us Cheat and Win. Thus showing all other autonoumous life and non life formz THAT OUI R THA BizEst

ROCKLY

Monday, December 06, 2004

Whats your perspective on ALieN LiFe forMS?

I was reading a HIGHly enlightening "SA" about SPACE aliens from OTHER PLANETS. The more I think about it the more I think: "PEOPLE should consider this carefully in realtion to their DAILY LIVEs" - including all the details but this time maybe in a new PERSPECTIVE in light of something different. %~~~%% BASICALLY some thoughts 1 TIME 4 YOUR MIND.

I feel like EVERYONE thinks about the possiblility of an EXTRA_TERRESTRIAL VISITation by other INTELLIGENT BEINGS. But one person to the next, there might be differnet ways of thinking.
%%%%%%%%%%%let me explain%%%%%%%%
first of all you might think that OTHER PLANETS AND THEIR PEOPLE would B A GOOD OPPURTUnity to TRY TO B OUR BEST. For example, we might want to get along with each other so the ALIeNS think humans are a good species. And if that didn't work WE could always convcince the ALIENS that some of us a REASONABLE so we go and join the NEW SPECIES somewhere else and be RID of the worst problems of EARTh (For example SUN RA actually built a SPACESHIP 2 DO this(!)).
~````````````BUT~~~~there are others who ALWAYS think that its ALL about KILLING the aliens to make sure they don't ruin EARTH. Even though some might think that life here CAN REALLY SUCk (hello! doesn;t everyone sometimes!) it must be better than anything an OUTER SPACES SPECies could come up with. well I don't quite agree - I HAVEN"T seen any aliens but if THEY came here they MIGHT HAVE A DEEP KNOWLEDGE and new philosopies we could try out/ /
/// for example, did you know that the first INTERRACCIAL KISS on TV was instigated by the ALIENS OF STAR-TREK and it gave MLK alot of his ideas? Its true, they had the KNOWLEDGE to stand up 2 the system
%) <- what an alien happyface looks like
-KOJAK

Soccer Ball CompanionSHIP

JUST YESTERDAY, me and Mr. SoccerBall spent more time together than we have in a long time. Its good to get in touch with some OLd Friends, Like Mr. SoccerBall and LITTLE BLACK who is out from San Fran. Let me just DEtail A bit of teh action that Mr. Soccerball was able to experience Just yesterday.

He woke up around 5:15 AM and had to just sit around and WAIT there for me and LITTLE BLACK to get up (AAROUND 11A) SO I M pretty shure he was really bored, and then he had to wait EVEN MORE, while some stuf went down like EATING BANANA PANCAKES AND UNLOADING A BRAND SPANKING NEW DONATED PINPONGTABLE ON THE STREET. after all taht was done, Mr. SoccerBall was ready. First what happened was Mr. ROomate kicked Mr. Soccerball FULL FORCE INTO THE FRONT DOOR. he bounced back and slammed a chair OK just warmin up! now its time for ROCky and Mr Roomate to try to distract LITTLE BLACK while he is tryin 2 talk on his cell phone by kicking Mr. SB into each other NOTE: A NARROW CLOSE CALL FOR A BEAUTIFULL CAT FOOD DISH AND MUCH FLYIING INSIDE. Allrite lets Go outside.

So now we are going to the park. its about a good 20 blocks away. And I AM talking new York City Blocks. So we dribbled and kicked Mr. SB all the Way THERE.RUNNING UP TEH STREET !! OFF OF BUILDINGS WHAM!!!! INTO CARS POW tHRU INTERSECTIONS, we didin't EVEN stop to look for Traffik !!!! F(*k it they can get our of OUR way Right MR. SOCCERBALL?? rite. Then POW I kicked Mr. SB High into the Sky and he bounced off of a wall (boink) and then BANG landed on the roof of a cheesy little square car inside of which a little old lady was sitting. She made a SPASMODIC GESTURE like there was BEE IN HER UNDERWEAR and them She opened the door of her car and said ""WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU??" but we were allready .5 blocks away running with Mr SB. finally got to the park and met upwith others.

NOW mr SoccerBall got to do a little Lo Key RELAXATION IN THE FORM OF HACKY SACK STYLE JUGGLING btw Logan (the great writer) and "M_stylin" (the great philosopher) was there. then we took Mr SB out to food and THEN We decided he was AS COOL AS A PERSON so we decided to take him to "THE HOUSE OF FLYING DAGGERS" in which there were flying beans, flying dirt clods, flying swords, flying people, and yes FLYING SOCCERBALLZ!!!!!#$^&@*$ (JK). I was so excited to be watching this film that I kept bounicing Mr. SoccerBall off the back of the head of the guy that was sitting in front of me. JustK again GOD!

then we took him to a bar where he LOOKED OUT OF A WINDOW onto the city B_low. FINALLY he was tired and I took 2 my work where he sits TO THIS DAY. I think He may still B tired

rocky

Friday, December 03, 2004

SpiRalz of inSANiTiy)_(

What UP?

man do you ever go into SPIRALZ OF INSANITY?? What I am talking about specificallly is the folloWING: say (just HYPOTHETICSALLY) not reality OK> say that you are saying goodbye to someone and you are feeling a bit miffed. Like maybe you aren't totally satisfied with the way that goodbye went and then, say you are at a party. and then you are like Well i will just go out and try to find that person again and say goodbye again AND THIS TIME IT WILL BE BETTER@ but then BIG SURPRISE!!! you can't find them. so you decide to, say, just give them a call at, say 2 in the morning, to tell them JEE that was a wacky goodbye we just had. SO you call, and they don't pick up, and then you are thinking, maybe they just didn't pik up so you call again. NOW ITS 2 IN THE MORNING AND YOU JSUT CALLED SOMEONE 2X AND they didn't pk up. Can't be a good thing. So you are so preoccupied with it that you decide to maybe call them up at 835 am the next morning, GOOD IDEA??? i think no. Cuz they are obviosly sleeping. Now imagine this, they pik up the phone and hang up.OOF what the hell do you do now, all becuz you were feeling a bit miffed. kind of silly rite? today moral and life lesson?? You know what I cant tell you cuz I don't know how that 'HYPPOTHETICAL' ;I SItuation ends.... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

rockuy

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Rx Rx ~~medecine - sometimes in WORKS!

IF U havent't heard from ME in a while::::MAY-B ITS CUZ MY HEAD FELT LIKE IT WAS going 2 EXPLODE
<($#%$#^%& :( >
U know how sometimes in an airplane you Prentend 2 B chewing GUM (or maybe really chew some JUICY_FUIT!!) to try to ""POP YOU"RE EARS"". I did that when "JETTING" around the country over THNXGIVIN but it totally did'nt work.
NO what????? My HEAD got somehow infected - maybe with POISONOUS AIR from other passengers - and it really SUX.

HAve U heard of the so called "GERM THEORY OF DISEASE" ???? - probably yes, but you might not want to believe in it too much! ALSO DO U believe in the SCIENTIFICAL power of MODERN medicine??? I think the SAME APPLIES - 4 example don;t believe the hype about """do you ever feel unhappy? - WELL WE HAVE A PRODUCT FOR YOU"" In light of current events its totally obvious that MEDICAL MARIJUANA is only illegal cuz U can grow it yourself 4 FREE!!!

But back to my own issues I took a PILL and I feel ""PRETTY GOOD"" - now I am once agian a productive memeber of the BLOGGING COMMUNITY and society as a whole................
remember: feeling bad sometimes is a part of NATURE!! (my wise grandpa told me this)
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@kojak

Monday, November 29, 2004

Is it all WOrth it In the EnD---Ω

i find that if you think 2 much about these things they aren't as good, you knowWHAt i am saying--Ω so anyhoo i was thinking I want to tell you all a LLITTLE SECRET!! readYYYY?? this is it GUES WHAT?? Gues what my MOST HATED WORDS ARE OF ALL TIME!! Guess, I bet you never will Get ready for some YinYang shit - Random and Sketchy. actually i have developed a love for them now, but Beleive me I think that they are the last in a royal lineage of Youth words and they mean nothing and have none of the cultural weight or strength that words LIKe GNARLY do. so? well I was thinking about this the other day 4 me RsBF may be an SUPER AWESOME ZEN EXPERIMENT OF FINDING NOTHING IN SOMETHING OR something in nothing. If someone sez to U "You are SO random" what the hell does that mean NOTHING. See now the secrets out but yo this is about telling the truthyall.

On the other handds I thinkits time to stop trying to force it. Don't Fos yo self you know? I hope everyone heard that song Aobut FOODs. What else. The other thing I needed to do 2day was laundtry DAMN IT DAMN IT+

rocky

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Turkey eating CONTEST !!!!!

Lets talk about THE SPIRIT OF THE SEASON. for example on SUNDAY NITE i went to a potluck. I know what you are thinking:::HOW COULD A POT BE LUCKY---Ω well you've mixed it up a little bit, what I am talking about is a POT-LUCK. its where you go and you SMOKE POT AND GET LUCKY HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHA. OMG JK. I did eat a brownie with """""PEANUT BUTTER"""""" in it, but I didn't get LUCKY. but whatever. I consider myself LUCKY JUST TO LIVE THE LIFE I LIVE AND KIK THE RYMES I KIK NO---Ω

anway lets start getting a little bit more serious and not get so carried away with excitement. Lets calm down and DO A REAL SOCIAL CRITITQUE SHALL WE---Ω the subject for destroying today:: a movie:: again:: its called:: KRISTMAS WITH THE KRANKS, and i have to say it looks like almost as bad as any damn thing that has hit the streets thus far. IT is trying to be a FAMILY MOVIE: cuz people in the US can't spend time together doing any intereswting traditions LIKE SPENDING TIME IN GRAVEYARDS ALL TOGETHER as a FAMILY, which is waht they do in a few other countryz. WHAT WE LIKE TO DO WHENits ""the special time of year"" is go into a dark movie theater and WASTE A LOAD OF TIME AND see A SHISTY movie. ITS VIRTUALLY IMPOSSIBLE that this KRanks movie could be good, even though it contains a wealth of talent. JAMIE LEE hermafrodite Curtis and That fat dude taht was on one of the tonite show the other nite, MAN LET ME TELL YOU THAT was a sad moment. HIM TRYING TO plug the movie and be natural HE WAS SO PAST HIS TONITE SHOW PRIME.

now I bet i know what you are thinking again: why cuz i am FREAKING PSYCHIHC thats why you are thinking, ROKCY, why are you paying attention to the TV and the stupid movies. And I say to YOU:: HEY its in my face!! i can't get it outa my face, sos i have to comment on it.

roCKy "the TurkeySlicer"

OH Yeah SHOUT OUT TO "LITTLE BLACK"

Friday, November 19, 2004

B-ware the ACTION HIPPY

I need 2 warn everyone about a MAJORLY annoying phenomenon you're most likely to encounter in the NORTHWESt of the USA ((like for example Seattle)

::the weather gets ugly then you see CERTAIN TYPE of people trying to pretend that IT"S ALL GOOD AND IT DOESN;t affect them at all. Note to the guy who I saw WALKING AROUND BAREFOOT the other day around CAMPUS::::"you will not achieve COMMUNION with mother nature, actaully NATURE MIght give you PNeumonia and kill U!"
Same goes for the people who SIT on concrete and try to work on a LAPTOP outside whe nits all cold and damp. I know I recommended this sort of thing only a few weeks ago but GIVE IT UP!! (you're making me cold just watching)
Also when riding a bike WEAR SOME LONG PANTS and NEVER< UNDER ANy Circumstances wear FLIP-FLOPS between october and april.

On the other hand I'm HAving Troblue TYPING lgfif i sidf!! !* !
Its been a long week tyring to ADVANCE THE COURSE OF HISTORY through scientific pursuit (thanks rocky for acknowledging the efforts but SOMETIMES I WONDER???????)

----KOJAK-----------------

a quick survey: ROLEX CAN BITE ME

the other night I was on a date with a certain fellow, and all was going swimmingly. I ASKED HIM WHAT TIME IT WAS because I had promised a friend I would phone them, and he noticed that my wrist was BARE. he inquired where my watch was, and I replied that I do not make it a HABIT to WEAR them. from this point, the date went DOWNHILL. said fellow got majorly on my CASE for not wearing a TIME-KEEPING DEVICE. he asked me how I ever know what time it is, and I told him if I need to I will ASK someone next to me, or TAKE MY CELL PHONE out of my purse. ASKING PEOPLE THE TIME IS A VERY SOCIAL ACTIVITY IMO. he rolled his eyes and said WHAT A WASTE OF TIME! I thought to myself maybe you're the waste of time!

I ASK ALL YOU READERS OF THE RSBFART COMMUNITY, IS IT FAIR TO DISCRIMINATE AGAINST SOMEONE FOR NOT WEARING A TIME-KEEPING DEVICE? I know there are flashy folks out there who have made it a LIFE GOAL to someday own a luxury watch that rhymes with BOLEX. but when I notice all the people on the street who check their watch NERVOUSLY because they can't look STRAIGHT at you while walking towards you, I am assured that I made the right choice.

-intoccabile

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

GOOD vs Eeevil

Last nite I was amongst 50 of the greatest scientists, policy leaders, and progressive business men and womyn in the world today.
I was just in there (trying 2 get my job done) and thihnking 2 myself. rocky WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU DEVOTE MORE OF YOUR LIFE TO SCIENCE AND MATH. CLEARLY MOST OF THE PEOPLE THAT MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN THE WORLD ARE SCIENTISTS - just take a look at KOJAK or perhaps THIS OTHER DUDE THAT LIVE In san FFranscisco that may one day write a column on this site _ which he calls "smelly dogfart". HA HA very funny JUST CUZ YOU ARE A SCIENTIST, doesn;t mean you need to make FUN OF RSBFART, because RSBF "IS" SCIENCE. ITS the ONLY "SCIENCE" rocky HAS.

I wan't to help the world BUT I HAVE TO DO IT MY OWN WAY. AND MY PATH IS IN SO MUCH TUMULCHOWUS TURMOIL Who knows what will happen next. I AM JUST HAVING A CONSTANT PANIC ATTACK ABOUT NEEDING TO ADVANCE MY LIFE BLAASA

like the other day i saw this OLD lady in the subway (not only adults and kids in subway - also oldies!) and i though she is old and world weary (notice lowercase) she doesn;t think about email or Advancements, she just has to deal with them, as far as she is concerned they are'nt giong to improve her life, that she knows. While WE THE YOUNGER have to plan and have to figyure out WHERE THE changes are going to be

And now YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE SIDES, BUT ITS SO MUCH MORE SUBTLE THAN YOU THINK

ROCKY

Saturday, November 13, 2004

children or adults-which would you choose?

maybe some of you noticed the other day was named for Veterans, but it seems strange to me that children benefit most from all those wars, because they don't have to go to school. The trains were full of kids, and this always makes me laugh, because usually the only kids you see on the trains are ear splitting, unfunny teens or little things trapped in strollers. is it true that a manhattan child spends the first 18 months in a monstrous xcountry stroller? how do they ever learn to walk? no, what i'm talking about is the roving children in between, who already know how to get a good seat on the train. on my way to school a little 7 year old girl practicially dove between me and another person to fill the six inch gap, which she assessed would fit her just right. rightly so-- she wiggled in, crossed her legs, got out her drawing pad and silver pencil, and promptly leaned into me like i was the back of her chair, and angled her legs towards the other lady, like she was the footstool. while her mother urged her not to get her dirty boots on people, she struggled to remember this adult law. now, why is it when I inadvertantly bump people on the train, or get shoved into them, they look at me like i should be THROWN OFF THE TRAIN? i think people who expect not to be touched on the train should be BANNED. i'll ride with the kids any day. it was just my luck, for on my way home, i rode with bubba and trey on the 2 express, who had two mothers and two strollers w/ two occupants and took up a lot of space. Have you ever noticed that most of these small people, once they get a seat, dont' sit down at all, but stand up and instead of looking around at everybody, seeing who's hot, who's not, who smells, who hsa cool shoes, they turn around and look out the window ! so i was doing my adult reading next to bubba, who's looking out the window at whatever darkness is so exciting, and suddenly i feel a fuzzy gloved hand stroking my hair. it's bubba. his mother yanks him off, but i'm laughing so she laughs. bubba goes back to staring out the window. then i feel someone hugging me, except his arms only reach around my neck. bubba again. yay for bubba! please, let's have more holidays so we can put more children on the train, and get rid of pissy adults. otherwise i'm going to have to stand up on my seat and stare out the window, the WHOLE RIDE !
Logan

Thursday, November 11, 2004

CHICKEN PARMAGIANA 2X IN ONE DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!®®®®®

OH MY GODDDDDDD!!!!!!!! I ate Chicken Parmagian 2 TIMES IN ONE DAY>>>>>>>>>>>>
first I ordered THE HUGEST chicken parmagiana sandwich 4 lunch and then MR ROOMATE COOKEd THE HUGEST chicken parmagina DINNER with

ANGEL <<<<<<<<<<<<<< HAIR <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

pasta, and then desert. LEt me talk about CCARBs 2 you for one moment:: REMEMBER wen you used 2 """"CARB LOAD""""" before soccer Gamez, or if you didn't play soccer, MAybe you Played a little AMERICAN FOOTBALL or what I like to call "Pigskin KickING". anyway I am sure that you ate a bowl of pasta B4 the game. and NOW WHY HAS THE CARB been demonized so? Well, it makes you Fat, thats one thing, I don't know about ewe, but I am getting OLDER. Yes Older, And wiser, and I need to stay at the TOP OF MY PEAK!!! so that why I at least try to THINK ABOUT eating salad at least once a day. even if I am eating a double cheezburger or donut, or maybe some Other disgusting food, I will at least try to make myself feel guilty 4 destroying the environment and destroying THE HUMAN BODY, namely my own. U know what screw aLL this I can EAT WHATEVER I DAMN WANT> i heard taht in japan its

VIRTUALL IMPOSSIBLE to be a vegatarian, *****even though they have invented DOFU. HAI !

Konichi WA
HAI!
Nan de A na Ç–dfÇ™hjkljÇ©sdlÅGgjkcÇÒkÅGc

rocky

an invention 4 a NEW WAY OF LIVING

.........most important INVENTION I have made in a long while.
(and by the WAy this will be an important ALLEGORY 4 many important aspects of LIFE)

the other day my ALARM CLOCK went OFF !#@#@$#!$#!$#%^ !!! and I REACHED out and grabbed it then mashed the SNOOOZE but DROPPED IT ON THE FLOOR (hard woods). Tthe battery totally fell out and all looked lost but I put back 2GETHER and I tried to set the HANDS ((non-digatal TECHnol))to the write TIME>

SO after I WOKE up and looked at the CLOCK again and the time seemed completely RANDOM, like 4 O"""clock or something like that.
So the AMAZING circumstance that happened is that the clock still works ...TIC TIC TOC.. but the hour hand is ALMOST COMPLETELY RANDom - you never NO WHAT IT WILL BE AT ANY GIVEN TIME (but what is """time"" ANYWAY>>>see that's my WHOLE POINT!!!)

THEORY of why this clock is the IDEAL machine for living::::BASIcally if I ever really need to NO the time I already know what HOUR it is anyway. and the minute hand is exactly RIGHT!. Other TIMES I don;t care SO I look at the clock and think WHATEVER - I don't care about TIME its completely IRRELAVANT - TOTAL FREEDOM!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~KOjak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(by the way I changed the TIME of this post just 4 the HEll of it)

Wednesday, November 10, 2004

the ROCKETTES can keep that CRAP!

I just want to tell all yous BELIEVERS and NON-BELIEVERS that Radio City Music Hall is THE WORST PLACE IN THE WORLD, or even new york city, to see music. I went there last night to see a little band i like to call MODEST MOUSE, but i'm not even sure if that's who played because it sounded LIKE TOTAL POOP PEBBLES. if you were my friend, and i wanted to recreate the sound of HISTORIC RADIO CITY MUSIC HALL for you, I'd WRAP THREE T-SHIRTS AROUND YOUR EARS, put a pair of headphones over them, and press play on a PORTABLE MUSIC DEVICE.

Oh, and did i mention that i DROPPED $40 for this poop? WELL, I DID.

sure, i sat in the back of the orchestra section, under the mezzanine, and I'm sure it sounds better in other parts of the room, BUT I DON"T CARE. As far as I'm concerned, the whole place sounds like A DUNG SANDWICH.


- d. STROGANOFF

Monday, November 08, 2004

metaphor 4 someting? ≥≤

HAS THIS EVER HAPPENED TO YOU?? its just a question ready?

here it is, u are walking down the street and minding your own business, its must business as usual, like the usual business man that you are and you think to yourself JEEZ EVERYTHING IS TOTALLY NORMAL I DON'T THINK THAT ANYTHING COULD GO WRONG. a nd then !!!!!! IT DOES IT GOES WRONG .

you see what you think is a regular person. they are dressed regualr and by ALL of the regualar JUDGEMENT FACTORS they are not homeless or phsychotic. BUT THEN YOU notice taht they are TALKING to themselves. they are screaming and gesticulating and arguing, AND WHERE IS THE OTHER PERSON????? I DON'T SEE THEM!

you may have guessed what is to blame at this point, its the tiny cell phone with built in heaphones, and you know waht?? as far as i am concerned this is just ONE MORE STEP CLOSER to integreating the cell phone with the body. and hence ONE MORE STEP CLOSER TO MAKING MAN INTO A MACHINE. why not just implant the earpeice in the ear, its BASICALLY INVISIBLE allready!! Besides making me think that there are psychos all over, its also sometimes makes me think that they are talkint2 me! and I almost have started talking =bak. LIKE

"waht do you mean about the deals not going throuhg, i don't even know you and WHICH DEAL are you talking aboiut, who the hell are you anyway and WHY aer you have u RANDOMLY SELECTED ME to express your crazy psycho ideas about """"deals""

SO SKETCHY!!

one more comment, acutallly a suggestion. I wnat to to "FOLLOW THROUGH" like a good man and continue what I started, so here is an idea 4 the 3rd case. I think that the 3rd case could be heiroglyphic in nature, LIKE MANY OF THE GENIUSES online have allready figured out that you can make a SMILY FACE WITH JUST YOUR KEYBOARD!!!!!!!!!!! holy SH∆T..
i would like 2 propose this symbol for a question mark
---Ω
its like a bigger sideways q mark, also like a pesrohn shrugging.

what do you thinkg---Ω

rOcky



Saturday, November 06, 2004

taking a backseat to the big douche and the turd sandwich (south park reference)

I am OFFICIALLY not expressing my CONTROVERSIAL political viewpoints on this predominantly BLUE BLOG. that logan is a STRONG ONE and can totally kick my a$$. but as it turns out, my a$$ is already GRA$$ from my 6-block move today. that's right, I moved from ONE SIDE of the highway to THE OTHER. well there was MORE MOVING that occurred PRIOR to this in north jersey, but since it didn't occur in the NYC it was MOST LIKELY IMAGINARY.

THANK THE CLOUDS IN THE HEAVENS I decided to hire movers for today, or I would not have been physically able to get some VITAL STUFF here, like my couch. after my move date changed three times, I went from having a SQUAD OF FOUR friends ready to help to one + dad because the others had to work. no one else came to my rescue, like my one girlfriend who was evidently TOO FRAZZLED OVER THE ELECTION RESULTS to assist. WTF? anyway, the movers were MULTICULTURAL(korea reprazent!) and MAD COOL; they totally earned their keep and KEPT ME ALIVE all day.

on a sidenote, last night I went to a freakin' late HALLOWEEN PARTY IN MONTCLAIR, where I was most successfully dressed as the alluringly psycho GOGO YUBARI from KILL BILL I. so needless to say, this morning I was NOT PLEASED TO WAKE UP AT 7 o'clock in the A.M. to move non-stop until 5 o'clock in the P.M. but in the end, I am happily sitting in my new pad amongst BOXES OF MY $HIT, with no television but to my delight 10 wireless routers at my laptop's BID AND COMMAND. LONG LIVE ALMIGHTY BLUETOOTH!

-intoccabile

Friday, November 05, 2004

ONE MORE STEP HIGHER!! jlえあkあpncおwなs

FIRST OF ALL--------------------super exclusive rsbfart is the first to offer you jam 4 the day. THIS TITLE WAS given to me bY a friend of mine: CASAVERDE. AND THEN aNOTHER friend of mine let me post it up at his site,,,,,,,,,SO MAKE YOUR LIFE BETTER AND GO TO

http://www.implausibot.com/jam4day.html

next on the international takeover agenda--LETS NO ONE SCREW AROUND ABOUT developing the usage rules for the 3rd cASE. Like shocking sound wave of LETTERS COMING AT YOUR FACE the 3rd case will be a powerfull propoganda tool that must be used for promoting the R IGHT and destroying the WRONG.

4 those of you that don't know - the 3rd case is beyond capitals and Lowercase and reading it is the equivalent to being punched in the stomach. also i want to say that rsbdfart is not overtly political UNLESS IT NEEDS 2 B...

mostly what it is about is life,,,,,,,,,,,,,,BUT HEY pOLOTIX is part of life NO???????

••••••••••••••••••••••••rOCKy

Thursday, November 04, 2004

People of this Blog - i'm running for Prez

Logan here, resurfacing for a bit of commiseration and let's admit it, I have to marvel at the finer turns of this young country. If a Blog was originially a fine term for a block of cheese, what used to be what we now call an Election?
Rocky, Kojak, my apologies: I hail from Missouri and even the nether regions where W stickers abound and gay is still an insult . What's wrong is that no one there in the 'heart' land ever really identified with Kerry, he's "eastern" and threatening (because he's 'foreign', DC elite etc), as provincial as it sounds, its not actually that much different from the way we feel threatened by their view of the world. That is, I sure as hell don't like to align myself with the likes of my Springfield neighbors--hence, I don't ever plan to move back. Besides they (pentacostal c's, or even hard core c's) don't even count Catholics are Christians (no joke). Possibly it has to do with a certain amount of education and contact with "other" people (non-midwesterners). But come on, only about 20-30 percent of Americans are churchgoers--why is it that we've given about 4 million CF's power to dictate? I think the whole moral values shit is more shit than stat. (For example, my parents are liberal/democratic Christians--there's got to be 4m of those in the reds). There's also got to be a large group of midwesterners that isn't particularly pious but nonetheless feels Bush represents them better, cause he's just a simple, conservative, humble dude. People only seem to vote for who they think is most like them or they like most.
Which brings me to an important question: is Bush better looking than John Kerry? Personally I kind of like the long face better than the smirky face, the cut of a windsurfer better than that of a baseball player. Which brings me to suggestions for the next election: why not have some contest of physical mettle? Let's face it, if we're going to concede to an entertaining media, couldn't it be truly entertaining? none of this 'debate' crap, where they just rehearse their tired lines and 'burn' each other and give the same damn speeches over and over. Shouldn't we let them show off who they really are, their talents and creativity? Then we could really see who gets to be the man...
Then there's the basic fact that people who live in red states just don't think the trappings of easternness , or westernness, are cool, enviable, or admirable. loafers and blazers? not cool.
apartment when you could have a house? not cool. spending money on things you can't get anywhere else? not that cool. Hey , what's the difference between morals and values anyway? What happens when you put them together?
But don't despair: I have thought up a few tips for those of us who spent the third of November in a fog of disappointment and disbelief and who don't care to envision the next weeks or years. But to get ahead we need to think long term, and i mean like LONG TERM. I say, if we each have four or five kids within the next 4 years (fertility drugs recommended), we could get a leg up on the larger families in the midwest, the mormons, what have you. But that's not enough. Then, we need to firmly establish ourselves within Red states. Kojak you must return to Ohio and make Democrats!!!! Or we could establish a commune of sorts in the Ozarks, thus covering some of Arkansas, some of Kansas, some of Mo, and populate and convert. I say in 18 years those red states could look different. Forget about CA, forget about Chicago, forget about NY and NJ and DC--it's no longer cool. In fact it's no longer even properly American! We should learn to be less tolerant of our neighbors and more demanding that they think like we do. Did you know that in the town i grew up, when Community talk became the new thing for civic govt to focus on, there was a huge hulaballoo over whether "Tolerance" should be include among the official list of the community's values???
My other idea, even sneakier, is that we should ALL join the Republican Party!!! then we could fuck up all sorts of things, the fervent red rallies and polls and stats all at once... if one of us was really slick, he or she could run for office as a "Republican" and then have a "change of heart" once in office. Or we could run just to lose, always a sporty tactic. It's not an uncommon existence, pretending to be something you never will be--just look at Mr. O'Reilly.
I think it'd be fitting if we just refused to acknowledge the word 'bush' anymore. That is, if you hear someone talking about "Bush" on the subway, make sure to say loudly, WHO? Who is that? some reality TV show guy? never heard of him.....in fact, from now one I have to write it "B+_***&" or simply B---- . or just *&$%@! There are no more '*&^$#es, only trees.
And you know, with 18 years ahead of us and our bourgeoning families, that gives us ample time to devlop the SUPERCASE. Just imagine if the democrats had had the special text whose power is unheralded and its printing convinces ANYONE, we've got no time to lose. I'm so TIRED or writing in UPPERCASE, my GOD, I wish some kind of something would come in to the world and SAVE US ALL. One last tip: if you really want to wonder what's good about America, and why government is never what you want it to be, go see Hearts and Minds, the peter davies documentary. Even better, see it on election day. Fellow Dems/"Repubs", the future is waiting....I'm going where the red is....

logan undercased is disbelief



Wednesday, November 03, 2004

the ONLy thing worth noting from LASTNITE

I heard a PUNDIt say that there were some PROBLEMS at """"RANDOM""""" voting places in OHIO

!!!!!!WE"VE BEEN CO_OPTED!!!!

(& I'm not gonna take IT)

kojak

People of the United States: What the F*K are you thinking

Whats up with all those red states. DO I EVEN KNOW THESE PEOPLE? WHAT IS THE DEAL? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? I am glad that this blog has the potential to be international, because I may need to start blogging from somewhere esle: LIKE SOME OTHER, SMARTER COUNTRY.

A big WTF to the US man. At LEAST I know that the states that me and kojak hail from represented. see the THING IS I don't even feel like I am being controversial with this.

WhO Out THER IS Happy??


:(


rocky

Friday, October 29, 2004

strate from my Homepeice, homeslice!

UNLIKE THE US GOV. last nite i experienced hi degrees of representation from my homestate. As many of you may allready know NEW MEXICO is the best state so far. and we are showing all those that doubted us that they WERE WRONG> WRONG AS THE DAY IS LONG. last nite it was NM crew and one dude even had a COOL tatoo on his ARM of THE STATE of NM. how do you like the, apples???? and this other dude WAS GOING TO GET A TATOO JUST LIKE THAT ON HIS ARM TOO. excpet this time with FLOWERS around it. they don't call it "the land of enchantment" 4 nuthing.

Last nite I was thinking wow there were 4 of us dudes taht went 2 HI-skool together, we (NMreps) are really doing it in the world. and I just got back from there so DON'T EVEN ASK ME TO TESTIFY ABOUT THE DELICIOUS HEALING POWERS of a "Carne Adovada" burrito. Or perhaps a green chile chicken casserole _ both Tongue Tingling dishes that I was privileged to sample on my visit.(THE LATTER OF WHICH I ACTUALLY ASSISTED MY SISTER IN MAKING).

all in all, I suggest you go to NM rite now and drop everything you are doing ... then you will know THE ENCHANTMENT§§§§§§§§§©©©

rocKY as in MOUNTain

Wednesday, October 27, 2004

I am a FULLY MOBILE! COMPLETELY!!!

(((((I CAN GO ANYWHRE!!!!!!!!!)))))))
Attention Everyone........
ITs now OFFICIAL : I have all the CAPABILITIES to do ANTHING< ANYTIME< ANYWHERE<
The reason for this is that all my "STUFF" is portable and it can work without being plugged in "TOTALLY WIRELESS" (no strings attatched if U NO what I mean).

EXAMPLE: right now I'm at the library kickin' this BLOG and I don't give a CRAP about the comfort of my own home because I've got my TUNES going. Noone is ANNOYING me at all. Its impossible becasue I don't HAVE 2 HEAR them if I don't want 2. <~~~headphones~~~>

EXAMPLE 2: I NEVER have to worry about missing that CALL FROM A SPECIAL SOMEONE cuz I always have my "CELL" with me. So whoever talks about "waiting by the phone: is A FOOL because you can actually GO OUT, do whatever U WANT (like I DO all the time)

EXAMLPE 3: USe your own creativity "airport within an airport" ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE

NOW GO!!! DON"T STAY HERE (bring the computer outside for example)

-kojak

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

airport in an AIRPORT?? is this 2 much coincidince?

Here is what rulz more than farmers/ my grandma is feeling much better that IS what RULz. Thats WHY i went to santa fe to see grandma!! GRANDMA
I am in the Airport IF YOU EVER THOUGHT IT WAS POSSIBLE TO BLOG IN THE AIRPORT YOU WERE RITE SO THERE. and thery are gonna call my plane to DENVER so look out NYC i am coming bakkkkk to attack

rocky

Thursday, October 21, 2004

Wanna No Who RULZ?? - FARMERS -

So there has been some talk lately about the DECLINE OF SEATTLE...sum say that GRUNGE is dead or that THE INTERNET IS GOING BROKE (I'll B-leave that when I C it) or even EARthQUAKe or MT ST HELENS ˆˆˆ¬˜∆∆∆ !!!!

BUT perhaps the #1 THEORY has to do with too many BUMS and KID_BUMS (jr. bums????) and losts of STORES closing down in some of the so-called hip parts of town. (a certan mystery lady heard about this through the GRAPEVINE ALL THE WAY IN NYC).... ( she was like KOjak that's so sad I heard the whole PLACE has B-come SKETCH)

NO-WHAT? I say so freakin-what becasue we have a new FARMERs MARKET in my HOOD and it RULZ. Some of U might NO about PIKE PLACE but that is way touristy (they THRO FISH - BIG WHOOP).

My farmers market is so COOL mainly B-cuz of the farmers themselves. SOme of these PEOPLE aren't techinically farmers cuz they sell stuff like SALSA. but actually the SALSA MAN is one of the coolest because he totally HOOKED IT UP and gave me 2-FER-1 because he new I was a good customers. The other "farmers" do this kind of stuff 2 - like I got a big discount on ASIAN PEARS and also so much CILANTRO that I put on my freakin CEREAL (not really!!!_ ). and there's a guy from CZECHOSLOVAKIA who picks mushrooms out of the woods!

So basically all other stores can close down B'CUZ they never really SHOW LOVE like a FARMER DOES. (and don't even get me started on FARMER"S DAUGHTERS!!!!!! woo yah )

kojak

Monday, October 18, 2004

Despite Not eating weekend was success

So here is a list of what I ate this weekend:

Cheeseburger Deluxe
4 donuts
3 cups coffee
and then at 11 pm oclock on sunday finally
A BOWL OF PASta

and guess how i feel now? JUST FINE THANKS VERY MUCH!!! :? Sometimes you just forget to eat and then you have to compensate a bit by eating a DELUXE CHEEZBURGER?! hey its not MY problem!!! although i have to say i am looking forward 2 lunch (which my company payz 4) ;) GET IT??? saving $$$$$$ by not eating is THE NAME OF THE GAME!!! The other thing that made my weekend a success was getting together a group of people and singing out to the world! THEREZ NOTHING LIKE SINGING TO RAISE UP THE OLD SPIRITS AND THE YOUNG SPIRITS. (((JUST ask the ancient GREEX who compozed many a tune so as to RAISE THE ROOF() . any way the moral of my story is - STOP JUST SINGING IN THE SHOWER - GO OUT AND JOIN A CHOIR!!!!

•___rΩCK¥___•

Thursday, October 14, 2004

NEWS UPDATE!!::: my indian summer projects

Who hear remebers my INDian Summer PROPECT that I mentioned on these pages O-so-MAny blogs ago??

Well THATS OK me neither!!! ; HA HA HA :)

Irigardless of whatever I said B-4, the thing I have been working on lately is RIDING MY BIKE WITH NO HANDS.
I've been cruising around in the BEAUTIFUL AUTUMNAL weather trying to look O-SO_LAid-back and without-a-care-in-the-world. Before U say :""Kojak B CAREFUL that's DANGERous" I will tell you that I have a REGULAR BIKE RIDER for a reallY LONG TIME. It seems like these days more and more yuppies/hipsters GET Bikes to look cool.

Well let me tell everyone that : "I'm not New 2 this, I'M TRUE 2 THIS!!" ((((and what better way than to ride NO_HANDS?))
BUt actually, 2 B honest (this part is more like a REal World� confessional) I'm actually not all that good at riding no-hands.
I totally should B - BUT for some reason THE SKILL IS A BIT UNDERDEVELOPED as of yet.

I should add that I have had a MESSENGER BAG for a real long time compared to most people. Unlike a lot of CHUMPS I know how to USE THE STRAPS in a a highLY effeciENT authertIC messenger style way.

BUT still I've got to get BETTER AT RIDING with NO-HANDS to really show people my STUFF. Once I have SKILLS I'm going to show them off at CRITICAL MASS ride so as to both look cool and ONCE AGAIN STIK IT 2 DA MAN to pick up on a previously important theme here at the BLOG.

�K?JAK�

DownStairs = RANDOM_NOISE

A little not on some COMMON COURTESY - You may want to pay attention if you are considered a big pain IN THE BOOTY!©˙∆∆∂ by someone (just like how you probably payed attention to the 'mean peole suck' bumper sticker if you were mean). This morning I was taking a shower and I hear a great RUCKUS ensuing on the lower floors of my apartment building!

WHATS UP WITH THESE FREAKING GUYS !@ they talk mad LOUD and they start talking at 7am. Talk about annoying GET IT (TALK!). They drive up in their BIG TRUX, and they start freaking screaming in Spanish (Which BTW is a beautiful language which I have nothing against in fact I MYSELF ENJJOY A SPANISH OR LATIN MEAL FROM TIME TO TIME ;).

I think one contribuitng factor was this - the Yanquis are esmashing the Calcetines Rojas. and all these guys have MAD PRIDE, and they think just cuz they live in New York that they can ACT ALL SKETCHY AND SHOUT AT RANDOM MOMENTS LIKE THEY HAD TURRETS SYNDROM.

I tell you what its called, its called COMMON COURTESTY and we need to make it A LITTLE MORE COMMON IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN - DO YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN??∏∏∏∏∏∏∏∏∏∏ I think we need to put the CIVIL back into CIVILIZATION!!!

ROCKY telling it how it is straight from somewhere near the street.

Monday, October 11, 2004

THis is HOw I pay my AT and T BILL

this is how I do it: Ready?????

First I wait around for about 2 or 3 months. I guess they havene't figured this one out yet, Thye haven't pinned me down, So it continously surprises them when i don't pay. And then THEY ACT ALL HURT. LIke:

"Dear Rocky,

Why did you forget to pay your bill again, don't you know you are a VALUED customer and we love you so much, WE AREn't so much angry with you as much as we are dissapoointed with you. I MEAN good G&*(D you are more than halfeway towards 30 and you STILL CAN'T GET IT THRU YOUR FREAKING HEAD THAT YOU NEED TO PAY THE PHONE BILL EVERY MONTHE. COME ON NOW ROCKY, GIVE US THE MONEY OR we are going to talk to the student loan people and make sure that all of those student loan payments that you THOUGHt you made go strate into the toilet."

And then I look at the letter and I say to myself, JEEZ i onloy have a few weeks before i don't get busted and lose ALL MY PRECIOUS PRECIOUS CALLS FROM ALL MY FRIENDS!!

and then I will wait a few more weeks. And then!!!! I get another letter in the mail and this one isn't even trying to be nice, infact in looks like its from a WHOLE Different Squad of People at the company. And its says something to the effect of:

There armed gunment outside of your window rite now, don't even turn around just pick up the phone (WHILE IT STILL WORKS) and give us the cash.

And I STILL HAVE AN ATTACHMENT for my life so i pik up the phone and pay with my credit card and PHEW! and then i actually look at the bill (JUST FOR KIX) and I see a bunch of really questionalble expenses, like roaming when I ALLREADY PAYED FOR THE WHOLE COUNTRY DUH!!!!!!

I bet those corporate FReAKS are LOL at my trouble. argh©©©©©©
_______roCkY


Friday, October 08, 2004

4 the luv of god - DONT WATCH THE "DEBATES"

Well if thursday is the new friday then I tell you what:: FRIDAY IS NOT THE NEW DAY TO WATCH LAME POLITCS ON TV.

Let me start this off by saying that everyone alraedy knows who thay are "VOTING 4"÷÷÷???≠≠≠≠≠
SO Let'S not even DISCUSS IT, OK??
....and don't say you are SOME type of political "SCIENTIST" who is going to analyze the whole situation....
You already saw the "PERSONALITIES" that each "CANDIDATE" :0---< (lame duck candidate) got told to use for this "GREAT ELECTION SEASON" ( the system is what told them).

If you want personlity then READ ALL THE ARcHIVES for this BLOG!!!!!!
IF you want debate then FOR GODSSSAKEX write some comments to a POST OF YOUR CHOOSING.
DON:T go 2 a "TOWN HALL" cuz they don't exist!!! . this isn't Old New England.....go to freakkin CYBERSPACE where you don't need $10,000,000,000 ≥≥≥≥≥≥≥≥ to get into the "DEBATE" (as in the so-called town hall)

Also, like ROCKY just mentioned ORWELL::: I would like to say that most of time he didn't even write anything. He actually went out and fought the SYSTEM. He didn't cover the "DEBATES" but only did serious MUCKRAKING about issuses that really matter and that noone else was thinking about. ˚˚ˆ∆˙øø˙ some might call that RANDOM or just mere BRAINFARTS but I think you see the PARELLELS TO OUR PRESENT STRUGGLES WITH THE SYSTEM HERE AT RSBF!!!!


KœJAK

ThURsday IS the NEW Friday

¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬ø

Guess whats happening tommorw? I get up and then I go up onto a plane and visit a town called SAVANNAH GA. otherwise known as "THE CITY WHERE MY FRIEND IS GOING TO GET MARRIED". NOW i have been told that this is STRICTLY a black tie affair. But guess what?>???> The only WORTHWHILE TIE that i have a is a WHITE TIE!!

"IMagine the IRONY™™™™ººººººººººººº"

now i wouuld like to refer back to the title and complain a bit SO JUST HEAR ME OUT FOR A SECOND WON"T YOU?????? I don't like that saying: "This is the new that" 2 is the new three, black is the new white ETC. Basically what this is is a something that a CLOSE PERSONAL HOMEBOY OF MINE• George Orwell• refers to as doublespeak. IN FACT last nite i went to a PANELIZED DISCUSSION OF PRECISELY THIS PHENOMENON. ITS about how LAnguage is in serious trouble and we better freaking save its a∆ss, CUZ THE GOVERNMENT IS GONNA TAKE OUR LANGUAGE AND TWIST it up and break it!!!

Finally, as I just set up this COmputer at home I had to do a google search to find rsbfart and I found something that you SHOULD DEFINTALYE read. at least a few sentences:::::::

http://www.highgrounddesign.com/design/dcessay4.htm

Peace_ I eat a peice of wedding cake 4u
RoCKY

Thursday, October 07, 2004

2 random 4 coincidence!®

®†ççç熆© ATTENTION EVERYONE!
If you have been following VERSION 2 of this blog you might know that in 3RD CASE "®†ççç熆© " means that the time has COME for something MAJOR ΩΩΩΩ∂∂∂∂∂

Now everyone since the ANCIENT EGYPTIANS HAS knowN that AniMALs (MAL means bad in LAtin) are sometimes HARBINGERS of FANTASTICAL events.

I will be the first to admit that my MUCKRAKING has been a little thin recently (not that I havN"T been knee deep in the MUCK) but luckily a found something important on some random GRAD STUDENT WEBSITE.

This concerns what you might have Heard about VOLCANIC ERUPTIONS due to strike the NORTHWEST USA.
≈∆≈ please for your own sake check out this picture:
http://staff.washington.edu/glick/pictures/fly.jpg

OR if you want to skip ahead to what the END OF THE WORLD MIGHT LOOK LIKE::::::
http://staff.washington.edu/glick/pictures/fuzz.jpg

≥¬¬π““‘‘‘‘‘‘‘‘kojak

PS: you know what might really be cooler as THIRD CASE than all the random symbols we've been doing are ACTUAL PICTCURES on the blog (RRRIGHT!!). I fear some of you won't check out these VITAL LINX. But remember this isn;'t the NY TIMES OR NEW YORKER or whoever else bit our STYLE but the RRRREEEAAALLL DEAL ®®®®®®

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

I'd like to take a moment to talk about STROGANOFF

This is someone who WE AT RSBFART beleive has a lot of potential. THIS is STROGANOFF he has only made only ONE comment on the BLOG _ QUIZ question: where did MR STROGANOFF make this comment (this one of for ADVANCED READERS OF RSBF,

But it was a comment that got to the very core of REALITY AS WE KNOW IT TADAO!!!!!!!!!!#$%&*(&#$*^*(#$%). Now you may not beleive it, but I have met MR STROGANOFF in person and his wise words are truly not for the faint of HEART. Dear Stroganoff please SHOW US that you KNOW THE LEDGE like eric B and RAKIM

NOW FOR SOME PERSONAL NEWS: its getting cold outside.

rockmasterFlash

Monday, October 04, 2004

LETS GET BACK TO THE MuckraKING!

Heres a LITTLE STORY for you. Its a story about how I got SCREWED. by a particular museum in Queens, NYC, new york. I won't mention their name.

JUST KIDDING I WILL mentinon it and its called PS1. I went in there to see a video installation. They let me Pay my money and then BOOM I walled thru the entire freaking museum and guess what I found: CERTAINLY NOT WHAT I WANTED TO FIND. The exhibition had been taken down and there was just a bunch of lame ass CRAP That I didn't give two shakes of a lambs tail about (RYan McGinley etc).

When i tried to bring the misleading ways to the attentoion of the person selling the tickets. She GOT ALL DEFENSIVE! and said "ITS posted on the door" and so I look behind me and LO AND BEHOLD there is a little 8.5 by 11 peice of paper and says what exhibitions are currently up_ not even what was taken dwon, EVEN THOU outside it says that what i wanted to see was still up.

I THINK AT THIS POINT YOU PROBABLY UNDERSTAND MY EXASPERATION!!! :(------2

POW!
rockY
PS- Rocky is my REAL NAME!!!!

Thursday, September 30, 2004

the NEW YORKER COPIES RSBFARTS STYLE!

you know you've made it in the world when THE NEW YORKER copies your style! Here is a quote from a recent review of "The Village" by Anthony Lane

...the villagers are told by their elders not to venture outside of town because of the HUGE SCARY MONTSERS IN THE WOODS."

No if thats not copying a patented style i don't know what is, which is why we really need to put our heads together and get this 3rd Case going. small letters CAPITAL LETTERS SuPeR CaSe

See i don't even KNOW how to write it

rocky

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

GIVE IT AWAY NOW

OK everyone I just realized this is VERSION 2 of the random sketchty brainfart blog so I'm gonna lay down a little bit of the NEW PHILOSOPHY AROUND TOWN.

Excuse me for quoting FLEA in the title of this piece but recently I've been on a MINIMALIST KICK all about getting rid of possessions.

Here's a funny joke with PROFOUND PURPOSE: "Why couldn't the Buddha vacuum the corner of his room????????????"
ANSWER: " Because he didn't haven't any ATTATCHMENTS" !!!!

For those who didn't take intro to Buddhism at college let me tell you that means he didn't have many possessions AND OF COURSE IT WAS WAY BETTER THAT WAY.

So basically I'm selling my car and whole bunch of stuff. (((ONLINE OF COURSE))))
Well definitley CYBER_SELLING because I recently took a HUGE HEAVY STACK of books to the bookstore and they only gave me a BUCK TWENTY-FIVE for all of it, RRRRRR!
Did I mention I could really use some cash? So like a certain mystery lady once said: "WHERE'S ALL THE MONEY?"
ALSO as a guy's shirt I saw in the CZECH republic said "WHERE'S THE FUCKING MONEY YOU OWE ME?"
This last bit only applies to some of you personally but remember: THE SPIRITUAL QUEST IS UNIVERSAL

kojak

LOST AND FOUND

now that the irritable ROCKIO seems to have DISAPPEARED, it feels safe to COME OUT AND BLOG AGAIN! and what BETTER DAY to blog than today? this morning I WAKE UP and walk outside to get nearly BLOWN AWAY by the gusty winds off the hudson! being LATE already, I decided it would be BEST to BUST IT IN A CAB to work. I sat down in the cab, and a MINUTE LATER realized I was VERY UNCOMFORTABLE because there was a LUMP BENEATH MY BUTT on the seat! lo and behold, there lay a SHINY FANCY-PANTS MOTOROLA FLIP PHONE that appeared as if OUT OF NOWHERE. my first instinct was to open it to see WHAT CARRIER IT WAS FROM. don't really know why. then I thought, if I leave the phone in the cab, the cab driver will probably HAWK IT ON EBAY. so that left the question of HOW THE HELL AM I GOING TO FIND THE OWNER OF THIS PHONE?

I devised a mean strategy of ANSWERING THIS PERSON'S PHONE CALLS for the next half hour. each time I gave the caller a very JUMBLED EXPLANATION of what was GOING ON. luckily, after a bit the phone's owner FINALLY REALIZED he LOST HIS PHONE and called. his name was B and somehow he came off like a WALL STREET TYPE (in reference to logan's previous post). alas! my hunch was correct! B *IS* a WALL STREET TYPE.

TO KEEP AN UNNECESSARILY LONG story just as long, B and I decided to meet outside my workplace after HIS WALL STREET MEETING. he called my cell, and I stood OUTSIDE looking at every WALL STREET TYPE that approached. ONCE I even pointed at some guy and held up the phone, but it wasn't B so I felt PRETTY STUPID. finally, B and his COHORT arrived. he dressed all SHARP and was FRESH FROM A MEETING. he and his cohort were VERY PLEASED to have regained his FANCY-PANTS phone, and I was PLEASED to have been of service. B asked me if he could give me some COLD HARD CASH as a thank you, but I REPEATEDLY said NO until he put his WAD OF CASH back into his SUIT.

my only regret from this experience was that I NEGLECTED TO PITCH him on PORTING OVER TO my cell phone company, which is BETTER THAN THE ONE HE USES.

-intoccabile

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Recount but NOT LIKE florida

Before things are erased from my mind BY THE SANDS OF TIME, I would like to tell you some news about PARIS. As cool as you mite think it is THE SUBWAYS or THE METRO as I personally like to call (me and about 5 million of my FRENCH COUNTRYMEN ha ha ha ha !!) shuts its doors to the world and 1AM sharp.

Now living in THE GREATEST CITY IN THE WORLD - NEw york. one does not encounter such inconveniences. Needless to say as a "Yankee" I was thrown into a mess of turmoil by this situaiont.

Basically What it boiled down to was the FOLLOWING SCENARIO.

Enter rocky, chinese dude, and group of french old dudes. We all sit there for QUITE A WHILE. and then! 3 trains pass on the other side and none come on our side. NOW mind yuou this is after I went way out on some wierd metro line try8ing to find my way thru the NETWORK OF TWISETED EVIL SPIDERWEBS THAT IS THE PARISIOAN UNDERGROUND! :) ---<

Ok next moment in our story: Old french dudes get up and walk away past me and the CHINESE DUDE who is looking at a map FURIOULSY. and i say to then "se termine?" and they were like YES ITS DONE, undoubtably grieving the day there country gave our country LLADY LIEBERTY on account of my bad accent.

then i get above ground and that chinese dude wasw looking around and i just went up to him and said BLA BLA and that turned into a 2 or 3 hour adventure of us trying to find a bus and then walk and a cab OH LORD. Needless to say our Cooperation will PAVE THE WAY for CHINESE_AMERICAN trade negotiations in the future

AND ONCE AGAIN I AM PROUD TO BE A PART OF HISTORY.

ROCKY

Sunday, September 26, 2004

BARELY EXSCAPED FRANCE WITH MY FREAKING LIFE

Well according to the customs agent at JFK _ ugliest airport in the UNIVERSE, I AM BACK IN THE US. and at LEAST every0one understands me here. well now that everything is bak to normal i think rsbfart will have a resurgence of positive FORCES after its DARK PERIOD.

I am working on Feng shui again for my room. (IF YOU CAN"T TELL) I am all about POSITIVE FORCES. Additional news: I have a peice of FRENCH BREAD that I smuggled past the security airport dudes, risking MY VERY LIFE TO bring you delicious cuisine from FRANCE: the country that gave us the STATUE of LIBERTY.

although if you asked a normal frenchy lay-person to tell you how to say LIBERTY upon reading it they would probably say LIEBERTY -

which is kind of true lies lies lies MAKE SURE YOU VOTE

rockY POLITICIZED

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

FREaKIN''' A Y'alllll

Yeah that ROCKIO is a bit of an A-HIZ-OLE but in a waay he's got a point.

I know the crew has been WORLD TRAVELLING like crazy so it can be difficult to blog.
Like CYBERSPACE is totally amazing and ALL About BLlowing up the SPOT EVERYWHERE although at times a computer can be hard to find. That reminds me of this one MICROSOFT ad where a bunch of more low-tech type people in a an AFRICAN VILLAGE get a computer and they all crowd around and there so happy because they can check out the WWW!!!

So basically what I'm saying is that RSBF could very well be reaching these type of LESS EDUCATED people and teaching them about the AMERICA and other places we go. ( I would like to add the at those people should KEEP PAYING ATTENTION)

On the subject of REDISCOVERING THE RANDOMNESS I would like to say that I waas recently in NYC and I ran into all sorts of AWESOME PEOPLE in a totally random fashion. For example, a certain memeber of the RSBF crew who is among the most ELUSIVE was spotting on a certain avenue in brooklyn with a certain boyfriend who I hadn't seen in forever!!!
Also, I real good friend of mine waS comlpetely randomlly in town after driving all the way from FREAKIN COLORADO.
This guy was part of a previous crew of mine called the KUHLI LOACH MEN that was as renowned as RSBF in the days before CYBERSPACE. Also, his brother was there: also a KUHLI LOACH MAN and a great dude I hadn't seen in even LONGER!!

So, I inclusion thats just a short SYNOPSIS of the TYPE of thing RSBF IS all about - so there rockio


--kojak 2004--------

Monday, September 20, 2004

paris is gay but not necessarily '4 gay peopple

whats up yall in paris here reporting 4 duty. i think i saw the communist pqrty headqurters today. they qlso hqve q werid habit of putting the q where the a should be here. btw that rockio is a real asshole huh. we should kik his qss

rocky

Thursday, September 16, 2004

ROCKIO IS BECOMING ENRAGED OLD TESTAMENT STYLE

ROCKIO (rocky's evil brother:me) IS BECOMING ENRAGED AT THE LACK OF POSTINGS. I FEAR A TERRIBLE FATE FOR RSBFART. LIGHTNING AND FLASHES MAY RAIN DOWN UPON WHAT WAS ONCE A BEAUTIFUL AND UTOPIAN LIKE ATMOSPHERE.

ITS GOING TO BE SOME NOAH'S ARK TYPE SHI*&^T. SOMEONE BETTER SHOW THAT THEY CARE OR RSBFART IS GOING TO BE EXPLODING IN A BALL OF FLASHES.

RSBFART WAS FOUNDED IN AN ATMOSPHERE OF THE FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION AND THE CONTRIBUTIONS BY THE COMMON MAN AND WOMAN TO THE CANNON OF WESTERN CIVILIZATION. DON'T IGNORE THIS WARNING LEST YE BE EXPOSED TO MANY FLASHES OF LIGHTE. MAY YE POSTERS OF RSBFART HEED MY WORD LEST THE ENTIRETY OF RSBFART FLASH AWAY TO HISSSSTORY

ROCKIO

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

WTF happened?

wtf happened to rsbfart? WHERE IS THE LOVE. Please People show your love in YOUR HEARTS by posting on this blog. OTHERWISE A TERRIBLE FATE WILL BEFALL YOU

ROCKIO

Thursday, September 09, 2004

BIZZY like a BEE yo

I am Bizzy like aBee yo. Thats why u may have noticed that I didn't Lay down a dope blog recently. Well rest assured I didn't forget about RSBFART, I just neglected it HA HA HA HA HA HA HA AH AHAHAHAHAHJ^&$#*(^&*#$^(&

Just kidding ha ha. No really just kidding. But seriously folks whats up with all the haite mail i get these days: Here is a sample:

ROCKY WHY DON'T YOU USE ALL CAPS ALL THE TIME, I CAN BARELY READ THE WISHY WASHY CR(*&*&P YOU PUT UP THESE DAYS.
----SINGED A CONCERNED PARTY...

here is another one.

Dear rocky,

Whats up with you? Your alwasys doin all this talkin and you better step up to the plate YO.


JUST KIDDING AGIAN - those were FAKE letters - JUST VOICES FROM MY SUBCONCIOUS!!! HA HA&U$*(#&U*$#&*

rocky

Monday, September 06, 2004

change of the seasons~MYSTERY OF NATURE

whats up everyone???!!!??
If you haven't heard from DA CREW recently it probably beacuse we just had a MEGA-GET-TOGETHER at a secluded country house where we BLEW OFF SOME MAJOR STEAM. WE took a break from the blogging although some major BRAINFARTS did occur live in person. ALSO, we bought some totally random stuff at a garage sale::::
I got a badass drum machine, rocky got a rad elephant pin, the mystery lady was sporting some MOOSE EARS, and intoccabile was just like: "WHATEVER DUDES THAT"S SO RANDOM"

OKAY so one thing I've thought of lately are some unsolved MYSTERIES of summer that I've once again not solved this year. really its all about what types of food and drink are good for HEATING OR COOLING OFF YOUR BODY in the hot weather. All this then changes around in the COLD weather and perhaps, LIKE ME, your left wondering STILL.

So one major controversy is ICE POPS VS< HOT CHOCOLATE on a hot day. The smart ALEC always says hot chocolate will make you feel cooler but once again NO ONE has proven this too me this summer. From hear you can get into SPICY FOODS, like if eating a HABENERO will cool you off like in MEXICO. I'm not sure about this one either, but perhaps a SPICY ICE POP would offer the best of both worlds.

I'm gonna try and figure this out during INDIAN SUMMER ........

............Kojak*********∆∆∆∆∆∆¥¥¥¥¥˚˚˚˚˚˚¬¬¬¬¬¬¬

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

Laverne and SHirley type SH**T

YO!~

Did you ever want to WORK AT A FACTORY??? BBOOOOOYA!!!! I was working in an "assembly line" type situation today and yesterday. It was all about STAMPIN and STICKIN and LICKIN. thats what I'm talkin about!!

I like the factory situaition because, while your hands may be a workin, your mouth can be a flappin, and you MIND can be wandering free!! ABSOLUTE FREEDOM DE LA MENTE! maybe this is what marx was talking about when he said that "FACTORIES TOTALLY RULE"

I don't know about you, but i got a 5 day Ki**K A"S weekend comin up. Tadao, as soon as I step out of this factory I'm a gonna bust foot loose like the longest weekend you ever imagined when you WENT TO SKOOL. Its called a 5 day weekend!!! Holy lord what am I going to do with all of that time? :)--l---<

On a more philosophical note: I WONDER WHAT KOJAK IS DOING IN EASTERN EUROPE???
here is my wise advise for the day: "Treasure the Moments of Freedom and Disrespect the MoMents of Servitude"

r_o__c___k____y

Monday, August 30, 2004

Freaked OUT!

You know what scares the living daylights out of me? WHEN I TRY TO THINK BACK ABOUT WHAT THE HELL I DID LAST WEEK AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID. I think I had this problem my whole life Bcuz I remember when I was a kid I made a little calender and I made dot for each thing I did in a day. I though it was a secret code and then I remember asking my little sis: HEY LITTLE SIS: DO YOU KNOW WHAT ALL THESE LITTLE DOTS MEAN? AND she was like yea and she knew - so then I think I stopped doing that, Bcuz it wasn't as cool as i thought it was.

I JUST DON'T WANT THE LIFE TO SLIP THROUGH MY FINGERS. But if you think about it, you are constatnly forgetting things, infact, I would say the default is forgotten. See this kindOf stuff happens when you compare notes with some that just went on vacation -----)-)-))) (SIDEWAYS PALM TREE).

Do you know what U did last mondy?????>>??>U&*&*$(%)$78*&YOR*RTYUORYUIO$%&Y*Y*&$

ROckY

Friday, August 27, 2004

RNC YOU GOT A HOLD ON ME

we can all smell it here in manhattan. the RNC is coming! RUN! HIDE! STOCK UP ON FOOD!

so, how are YOU preparing for the RNC? I myself am working hard both at home and in the workplace. you see, I can CONTROL the CELLULAR SERVICE in madison square garden from my desk. at the CLICK OF MY TRACKWHEEL MOUSE, POOF! bye bye to any republican who uses a cell phone on MY NETWORK! MWAHAHAHA!

I also am ordering like a THREE WEEK SUPPLY of groceries from freshdirect just in case the MILLIONS OF PROTESTERS break out of the CHELSEA PIERS PRISON and never leave our FREAKING CITY. you're laughing now, but in a week when this city goes APESHIT and all the tourists have EATEN OUR FOOD, see who's chomping on some tender FREE-RANGE CHICKEN and ORGANIC OKRA.

TO SUM UP, every night I look at the apartment across the way from my building and see a BIG SIGN that says 'BUSH' in xmas lights. it reminds me that CHAOS may be on its way, but DAMMIT I'M READY.

some tips on how to RUN A NATION

hey whats up?? SERVUS!! as we say in TRANSYLVANIA.

THis is kojak checking in like Uncle Travelling Max on the FRAGGLES (remember that???)

One thing I have to say is that some nations really have NOT caught on to the whole idea that TOURISTS ARE A GREAT WAY TO MAKE YOUR PEOPLE SOME MONEY!!!! THis seems so obvious but the rulers of the UKRAINE (possibly a chairman or commandante of some sort) appartently don't know whats up.

One obvious problem is that THEY TRY AS HARD AS POSSIBLE TO KEEP YOU OUT. WHy should I need a VISA for a place noone even likes?? and after that why are there SKETCHY ARMY DUDES manning the border post and giving everyoone a hard time??? They made me walk back and forth between all these KIOSKS so they could yell at me and write illegible stuff on little scaps of paper. (If I had lost these scraps of paper I would probably be in PRISON right now).

Also once inside the country its nice to have some stores for people to go to (LIKE DUTY FREE SHOPS, etc). UKRAINE only had people standing next to the road holding up random stuff they found outside like VEGETABLES MUSHROOMS AND FISH. If you tried to talk these people I'm sure they were nice but really I think THEY COULD USE SOME BUILDINGS, SIGNS, ETC.

SO needless to say I didn't stay long.

~~~~```KOJAK

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

Seasonable fashion: OLYMPICA SENSIBILITY

I will be the first to call this one: JUST LIKE I DID WITH SUMMER _ I AM TELLING YOU RIGHT NOW, get ready for the fall. What does fall mean? it means fall fashion and it means nothing else.

Whats hot this season? GOOD QUESTION: well its not the weather, the weather is going to get COLD. Its TUBE SOCKS. and its track spikes, just like always. The track spikes are the MOST FASHIONABLE THING POSSIBLE (great for weddings).

THIS is what I call "OLYMPIC FASHION" and it is really exciting. All the latest styles exhibited in volleyball, ROWING, and other sports. I suggest tacking on a little paper number on your back if you can't think of anything else. That is always a "winner" ----get it??

Here is another one - really Awesome OAKLEY WRAPAROUND SUNGLASSES. Basically the faster you look, the coooler you are.

NOw for hair. My vote for best hair in the Olympics goes to some japanese gymanst guy - it didn't look like he combed it ever in his life - total GYMNASTIPUNK. a 9.876 out of a starting value of 10.

What else? My vote for most naturally "indie" looking chick- TOM on the US volleyball team. And who can forget when that dude that wore a baseball cap in the 100meter dash? this is sure to set on a wave of hats like fire across the nations faster youth.

rocKY

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

ARE WE HABING A LUNCH OR WHA?

NEW JOB MEANS NEW FREINDS RIGHT? Wrong. People are liars and birches. "Hey, Welcome to the JOB LET"s GO OUT TO LUNCH," The seemingly nice/cool lady says to me. And then what? NOTHING! SHE BARELY EVEN SAYS HELLO IN THE LADIES ROOM NOW.

Well, little does that lady know I made another friend at work. Another new girl. A nice friend who has helped me to found the SANDWICH CLUB. What is the SANDWICH CLUB, you may be asking yourself? WEll, the sandwich club is division of labor, the sandwich club is the key financial freedom, the sandwich club is highly socialized and exceedingly refined. Let me break it down:

TWO DAYS A WEEK + TWO NEW GIRLS + FOUR SANDWICHES = non stop fun! maximum thrift! delicious midday meals!

Today I made sandwiches for both of us. Wednesday, she will make them for us. Tuesday, Thursday and Friday I will make my own mutha f'in sandwiches cause I'm thrifty like that. YES. HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT LADY IN THE BATHROOM WITH THE EMPTY PROMISES OF LUNCH. Yeah, I thought so...you keeping buying your $10 midtown lunches, I'm saving my bread for the new girls of the SANDWICH CLUB.

Saturday, August 21, 2004

check it out _ I'm in HUNGARY

hey everyone I'm blogging it up in Hungary.
I don't have much time cuz this is costing me $$$ (actually not - there's some strange money called Lita or something like that.)
Actually its not so differenent from AMERICA except iI'm suurounded right now by some beautiful ARCHITECTURES and I have seen a buch of TINY COMMUNIST STYLE CARS like the one BONO had in that one U2 video. aCTUALLY a lot of stuff could be in a U@ video.

I would try to say something in HUngarian right now but its really hard - but HELLO MEANS GOODBYE I THINK
so HElllllooooo!!!

kOJAK

Thursday, August 19, 2004

Ultimate state of CONFUSION

To those who are astute readers of this blog you may have noticed that over the last 2 dayz I have made 3 DIFFERENT POSTINGS all of which I have erased from the blog within a span of 12 hours. I think what I am trying to get at here is this is a MONUMNETOUS EVENT FOR RSBFART because it is the 40th posting performed. This at a time when our country is at a MONUMENTOUS TURNING POINT. I am just a bit superstitious so I don't want to FU^*K this posting up. My fingers tremble as I reach for the CAPS BUTTON which I know all too well, I know that the signigicance of this blog reaches far and wide and will have repurcussiuouns on political fronts AS WELL AS SOCIAL ONES. MUCH LIKE A BUTTERFLY FLAPPING ITS WINGS IN THE "asian tiger" economic market and next thing you know BOOM we lose 50 thousand donuts from a local dunkin donuts.

For those postings taht prevously occupied this premeir 40th postition (1. aTMOSHPERE, a kind of social anxiety discourse 2. I forgot the 2nd one and 3. "you LEarn OSMSTHING new everyday", about what my clients like to eat)
Those are gone with the winds of time, save that last one, which will be published should there be SUFFICIENT POPULAR DEMAND.

My message today is watch out! :() everything you do HAS SEVERE SEVERE EFFECTTS ONN THE UNIVERSE

ROcKy

Tuesday, August 17, 2004

HAMMing it up

I was watching MEN'S GYMNASTICS on tv the other day, BECAUSE I WAS FORCED TO. I don't mind women's gymnastics, but frankly male GYMNASTS are gymNASTY. I noticed that a couple guys on the ROMANIAN TEAM had particularly SINEWY MUSCLES that were GROSSING ME OUT. then there was the odd-looking CHINESE TEAM whose lower bodies resembled flimsy chopsticks as they showed the rest of the world how the PUMMELHORSE is DONE. SHIIIIIT. but the "CREEPIEST OF ALL" male contestant were the US team's twin terrors, the HAMM BROTHERS. TOTALLY FREAKIN' FREAKY. I couldn't watch for more than 10 seconds at a time without having to TURN MY HEAD AWAY from the telescreen. it was too TWILIGHT ZONE-ish for this one. to see TWO IDENTICAL DUDES GO THROUGH THE EXACT SAME FLOOR/POMMELHORSE/STILL RINGS ROUTINES, with but minor variations in skill! I mean, do identical twins really need to further accentuate the fact that they are IDENTICAL?

*buries head in hands*

-intoccabile

Friday, August 13, 2004

THE TRICK

WOAh wtf?? OMG it has been SO LONG since I blogged. I think what was holding me back is the shear degree of high quality articles coming from rsbfart these days. Its a little bit intimidating to tell you the truth, But then I just have to say to myself Rocky, rocky I say BLOGGING is just about letting yourself go, just letting your innards flow onto the page or the screen. I would like to think of a really good topic that we can all relate to, but SOMETIMES I JUST CAN'T.

I could tell you about the new GROCERY STORE IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD. Or the IGUANA I SAW UP IN A TREE THAT JUMPED DOWN AND LANDED ON SOMEONE'S HEAD AND BIT THEIR TONGUE OUT. Just kidding - thats magical realism (as in the literary GENRE). But seroiously folks, My brother will testify that he saw a huge SPIDER COME OUT A TREE AND LAND ON SOMEONE's head once in MEXICO. and that was REALITY not even reality TV.

About reality TV. I got new idea for a TV series. TEll me what you all think. First of all you have to pick an existing reality show: FOR EXAMPLE SURVIVOR. then closely study the relationships and so forh that were built during a season. Then you write a script that DRAMATIZES IT and then you film like a made for TV movie about "what really went on when the camera wasn't rolling, or even when it was rolling:. OK NOW HERE''S THE TRICK. SO WHAT YOU DO NEXT IS GET A SMALL VIDEO CREW TO DO A REALITY STYLE FILMING OF THE MAKING OF THE DRAMATIZATION OF THE REALITY SHOW THAT WAS SO FAR FLUNG THAT IT WASN'T EVEN REALITY IN THE FIRST PLACE. HOly Sh(**TT that idea is so good I can't beleive I am making it public. Anyone want to make that film with me?

ROCkY

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

SHHHH

Logan is back from a trip to the friendliest state in the world, the SHOW ME STATE. How friendly is the SHOW ME STATE? well, EVERYONE smiles and WAVES to each other through the shields of their automobiles, even if you are not pretty or are a STRANGER. Around town people often know who you are just because they know your PARENTS and they make SMALL CHATS, that is, asking questions but not really GETTING IT. The good people of SHOW ME LAND are also quite CERTAIN, perfectly REASSURED, that GAY PEOPLE SHALL NOT MARRY. It's not what GOD would have wanted for our nation. Even though there's already a law against it in the state, just to be ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN the good people voted to make an extra precaution which we call an AMENDMENT. Perhaps there are simply many OLD PEOPLE in SHOW ME LAND? Perhaps. Is it CHRISTIAN to refuse GAY PEOPLE official UNION? What if the GAY PEOPLE are NO DIFFERENT than the little CHILDREN, dirty grubby whiny unimportanat CHILDREN, that Jesus SUFFERED to come unto him? But you have probably heard of all this. Incidentally I believe I purchased a certain BRIDAL GARMENT in SHOW ME LAND, it's true. It is white and not so different from an expensive bathrobe. Does this make me a HYPOCRITE? how do I SHOW THEM that civic laws are not RELIGIOUS COMMMANDS?
Query to ROCKY, what kind of shoes does an URBAN friendly /indelibly SHOW ME bride-to-be require? A dilemma, if there ever was one. I mean: WHITE FOOTWEAR -- how will they ever be cool enough?
There are many new STRIVERS back in my uppest west side HOOD and such people wear the darndest things to, OF ALL PLACES, the LIBRARY. I sat behind a young lady (not mystery lady, who really should walk the blocks between 103-6 more), a young reader, who in her chair, from the back, jacket slung over the chairback, appeared, wholly and completely, BLOOMING NAKED. was it one of those BABY DOLL COTTONS that everyone seems to put above their jeans? Was it a TUBE TOP? was it too HOT in the library? (no: books hate heat). if i were a male, any type, i would have a difficult time studying instead of wondering about love in the afternoon.
Last overly political question: or maybe it's a POLL: in 30 - 40 years, will we DEMAND that our PRESIDENT have SERVED IN THE IRAQ WAR and if he HAS, will we, we who now sit in offices and god knows where libraries, will we be able to accuse him of unfortunately being in NAJAF when in order to really be BRAVE, he should have been in BAGHDAD ? or maybe he drove an SUV or Convoy Truck as opposed to a HELICOPTER? and if so , does anyone know WHO THAT WILL BE?
it's a halter folks, a halter top, obscured by hair. overreaction.
--logan

TROUBLED BY INSECTS

Here's a poetic thought for the day: ever think of how insects can SYBOLIZE BOTH THE BEST AND WORST OF SUMMERTIME.
For example we have, the pleasant chirping of CRICKETS but also the irritaging buzz of the FLY.
Another thing I've noticed is the more TROPICAL it gets the more totally out of control the insects become.
A scientist might want to test this hypothesis over the whole world but I myself can tell you one thing: its way hotter than normal in Seattle this year (global warming? hello!!) and the BUGS have seen fit to start acting Iike the OWN THE PLACE!!

I was trying to have a nice hike in the FOREST yesterday and all of sudden I hear BUZZZZING all around me. Well, I was thinking of all the advise you get from people telling you to REMAIN CALM AND GO ABOUT NORMAL in this kind of insect situation. But guess what?? that advise waswrong because these WASPS or whatever the hell they were just started atteacking my legs. Once I decided calmeness wasn't gwtting me anywhere I booked it doen the trail but not before those BEASTS had STUNG me like two times on each leg.

Fastfoward to today and I'm tring to relax in the park after work but the YELLOW JACKETS are BUGGIN me like they have been all day. Again I think about all those smart alecs who say that swatting bees only makes them ANGRY. This time I'm not willing to sit back and let some bugs CRAWL ALL OVER ME for a while then STING me just for the hell of it. So, y'a know what, I took my sandel and smacked one good and it FELL TO THE GROUND. SO WHO"S ANGRY NOW???? not the yellow jacket because I hit it again and it was DEAD.

Now I am a real ANIMAL LOVER. If I see you eat veal I will look down on you forever. But the YEllow JACKET isn't even a real bee. It's not honorable: when I killed the one its friends just flew away and doesn't make HONEY I don't think. So Your best to show it what's up....

^^^^^kOjAk

Monday, August 09, 2004

ROCKY's Cat = rubix cubix COOLEST CAT EVER

My cat is named RUBIX CUBIX and no other cat can ever step to her. She can PLAY FETCH LIKE A REAL DOG. She seriously gets stuff that you throw and brings it back to you again so you can throw it again. Also the other day there were about 10 to 12 people at my house screaming and playing PINGPONG, and Rubix JUST WAS SLEEPING THERE ON A CHAIR PAYING NO HEED TO EVERYONE. In fact at one point she even jumped on the table and tried to attack the ball, and then she fell asleep on the table. She is SO BOLD **(&*($&#@*)^$*

She came from BIde-a-wee pound and is just another example of how ADOPTING AN ANIMAL HELPS YOU AND HELPS THE UNIVERSE. She destroyed a rat problem, and she sometimes DRINKS WATER WITH HER PAW, and she also walks around like a monkey, additionally she will lick your hand if you pet her. I have had this cat for a while, actually I co-own rubix with a good lady-friend of mine.

What else? A few times I thought she was lost :( but she was just hiding ;) HA HA HA HA HAHAHHAHA AHAH HA AHA AH AHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ROCKY

STUDIES OF ASTROLOGy

A BIG SHOUT to rocky, kojak, logan, mystery lady, and anyone else on this weblog of TRUTH and PINK GOODNESS. my name is INTOCCABILE, which means something in SOME FOREIGN LANGUAGE.

my question today is, WHAT PERCENTAGE of these FRIENDSTER/MYSPACE/HIPSTIR SITES is for NETWORKING, and what percentage is for MACKING? I recently joined myspace following the lead of my CLOSE and PERSONAL friend rivers. IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWING my registration, BAM! in come 10 PRIVATE MESSAGES from some very UNINTERESTING HORNY GUYS. I don't recall posting anything about being SINGLE, NEKKID, or HORNY, so I was taken ABACK BY the SHEER AMOUNT OF JUNKMAIL in the first MINUTES of my existence in myspace. here's a taste:

"hi im aries im a gentlemen honest and would love to get to know you better before i leave nyc i go to Norwich university where i am a cadet majoring in three major Studies of peace Studies Of War and Studies of Diplomacy
Love Aries
p.s. im very attracted to you
im me please"

HONESTLY that was a TOUGH ONE to let slip through my fingers, but you know what they say: IF YOU TRULY LOVE THEM, LET THEM GO.

Saturday, August 07, 2004

an extraordinary adventure which befell kojak at a summer cottage

hey everyone, its SO NICE to see so many old and FACES [ :) :( :-0 ha ha!] populating this blog. Yes that includes you MYSTERY LADY and also R PUB who seems to be belligerent as ever. BTW I will proofread this message but not too much so as to diminish from the BRAINFART aspect.

Anyways, as regards the title it is more of a PROJECTION INTO THE FUTURE than the usual summary of daily events.
i. e. I am going to ROMANIA soon and I'm totally PSYCHED about it. I've been sufing up a storm on the web so why don't you check out some great stuff I found:

http://www.sighetumarmatiei.alphanet.ro/sighet_cazari/complex_mara_eng.html

This one looks like a really AWESOME PLACE TO KICK-BACK-RELAX. Check out the bar it looks amazing and i bet you can get TOTALLY WASTED FOR LIKE 25 CENTS. I'll drink to all you New Yorkers getting ripped off!!!!

Or maybe if I want to get extra close to nature at stay at this one "IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NATURE" !!!:

http://www.sighetumarmatiei.alphanet.ro/sighet_cazari/poeni_eng.html

Also the owner looks UBER_RESPECTABLE - an important thing when travelling in the more SKETCHY PARTS OF THE WORLD.
In any case, I plan on finding a CYBER CAFE and blogging to everyone back home to keep you updated. But don't worry I'm not going for a couple of weeks yet.

∆∆∆∆∆∆ Kojak øøøøø

Friday, August 06, 2004

No, I wouldn't like to help John Kerry today JACKASS!

Hey, you know what bugs the CRAP out of me? Those douche-bag young DEMS toting clipboards and LOITERING on the STREETS to ask me if I want to help out John KERRY. How am I suppose to respond to these NINCOMPOOPS when I'm in a rush to get to DWANE REED to buy $70 worth of CANDY? Do I say, "Get a job.", "Bush rules!", or simply "No. No I don't." Jeezum. This is getting me WORKED UP! Don't these kids know that most people don't fall for these bullshit GREENPEACE begging tactics? If young motivated people want to get political, it's fine by me, but WTF? Shouldn't they be a little more CREATIVE about it. I mean, make clever signs on CARDBOARD like bums do. Everybody LOVES bums. They make us feel better about who WE are, because WE are not as pathetic as THEM. But no, these young Kerry BOOGERS take the moral highground just to make the rest of us feel like LESSER BEINGS--like somehow, because we don't CARE about POLITICAL CHANGE as much as they do, that we are less useful to the growth of our NATION. I've just got one message for these FINGER POINTERS. Stop POINTING your DAMN FINGERS and go out and find Osama Bin Laden! Then maybe I'll sign your STUPID petition.

R-Pub

p.s. When are you going to get a spellchecker on this damn blog? For REAL.

EXCLUSIVE: RSBF first ever MOVIE REVIEW

I WENT TO GO SEE GARDEN STATE LAST NITE with a Certain Mystery Lady. Before I tell you about how corny it was, I will first tell you something that you may find of EXTREME INTEREST as a reader of this blog: They used the words "Random" and "Sketchy" several times, thus redeeming what might have been a TOTAL WASTE OF TIME. Once Zach Braff said to this other dude: "DUDE WHY ARE YOU TAKING US TO THIS SKETCHY CANYON IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE?" and I think I remember Natalie Portman as describing herself as TOTALLY RANDOM at one point. She was OK, kind of playing a "YOUNGER IN SPIRIT" character than she usually does. I was quite dismayed not to hear anyone use the "brainfart" code, but the characters certainly participated in the action of brainfarting.

Anyway I kind of lost some steam on dissing this film, I don't know if I FEEL LIKE DOING IT ANYMORE.

RoCKY

Wednesday, August 04, 2004

Pump Up the Volume

Greetings from a certain mystery lady!

Today I would like to call your attention to my insane downstairs neighbor. She is a total LUNATIC to the Nth degree. On Saturday morning, I got out of bed and she started RAP RAP RAPPING on my floor (her ceiling) with a broom. DUDES! Am I supposed to stay in bed all day? It was 11am!!! WTF? So, I totally stayed in bed for a little while, but then it was like, "No! This is my apt! I need to go to the bathroom!" When I stepped on the floor, she started banging again. RAP RAP RAP RAP! I walked barefoot to the bathroom and returned to my room and more banging. A few moments later, this insane lady is banging at my door, telling me she's trying to sleep and I do this every Saturday. What? I've only lived here two weeks lady and last weekend I was hanging with the Brainfart dudes! She tells me to keep it down, she works at nights, THERE'S A BABY DOWNSTAIRS, etc. CAN'T I HEAR HER BANGING?!?

Yeah, I can hear you. QUIT MAKING SUCH A RACKET, LADY!

Meanwhile I'm not opening the door, which really pisses her off. "OPEN THE F-ING DOOR!" She screams.

Uh, no. I don't open the door to cursing angry PSYCHOS. Unfortunately I live above one.

xox Mystery Lady

I'M SICK of people touching my laptop screen with their dirty ass fingerS!!!!

A little shout to KOJAK UP IN THE HZZY for taking note of a major socialogickal division. YO. Back when I grew up in SANTA FE NUEVO MEXICO!!!!!! :_ &_=^$#@#^&* i noticed these things. My mental struggle manifested itself in my footwear as it has since my childhood (see the chapters on screaming tantrums on the floors of FOOTLOCKER because the velcro wouldn't get tight enough in my life history book)

AnyWAY! As he said, or as I might interpret it, there are the TWO POLAR OPPOSITES OF LIFE Y'ALL. When you buy shoes in a place that offers any sort of aspiration to outdoor endeavours (SEE atle etc.) You must consider the option of buying the "rugged" shoe. Or at least the shoe that can handle a bit of dirt (SEE the nike ACG). Its simply irresponsible not to do so. AT THE SAME TIME WHAT YOU REALLY WANT TO DO IS GET SOME REALLY DOPE ASS SNEAKERS THAT HAVE ZERO FUNCTION IN NATURE. But they DO have style points and they are well suited to the growing world's urban character. So what do you do?

Well friends, that's precisely why i moved to the BIG APPLE. I'm taking a bite out of the city that offers almost no nature and I FEEL JUST FINE GETTING THE SHOES THAT ARE BUILT FOR IT.

I do miss the sunsets, the clean air, the grass and the tress though
PEACE

rOCKy

on the subject of DIFFERENT TYPE MALES AND FEMALES

First of all a major shout out to NEW BLOGGER logan.....S*H*O*U*T*

Second of all I would like to touch on a theme started earlier about different types of DUDES AND GALS.

Upon oservation and careful consideration I would say that I am a NON-SEATTLE TYPE DUDE. The way I see it the people who are SEATTLE TYPE MALES around my age group come in two forms as follows. One would be the ACTION-HIPPY type that always dresses in a way so a s to be prepared for adverse weather (for example WOOL socks) and climbs mountains with only HOMEMADE VEGAN SNACKS. The second type tries to be like the ultimate WEST_COAST STYLE with a cross between MOTORCYCLE TYPE and SURFER DUDE STYLES. They will very often play in a band but what I am saying is that THIS DOES NOT MAKE YOU AS COOL AS SEAN PENN, he was in the movies for godssakes!!

But actually who would really care about all of this if it were not for the fact many SEATTLE TYPE FEMALES are actually seen hanging out (OR WORSE) with these type dudes. There is no subway here but even worse Seattle type females are too often seen RIDING IN PRIVATE AUTOMIBLES with seattle type males. Don't take my word for it: Ask Rocky about a cute chick we saw with some dude in a pick-up truck: I totally stole his parking spot : SO THERE!!!!

KoJAMZ (aka kojak)